Category: Brother Al (Page 57 of 68)

In this post I want to write about a remarkable man: Ernie Malmskog.  Ernie died on January 16th.  I attended his funeral at the church where I came to know Ernie, when I served as interim pastor a couple of years ago.  Ernie was 97 years old when he died.  Ernie was a spiritual giant in my eyes,  because when I knew Ernie I was already 70 years old, but around Ernie I felt like a spiritual son.  I sat at Ernie’s feet, like 20 or so other men every Wed morning at Bethany Lutheran Church in Nevis, Mn.  Ernie had lead that group of men for many years.  They came faithfully to hear Ernie, “break the bread of life” as Ernie used to say, to feed our hunger souls with the Word of God.  Ernie was a student of the Bible.  It was fleshed out in his life.  His manner of teaching breathed life into our souls.  He had lived it for over 90 years.  Here are a few impressions.

Ernie prompted the Father Hunger need in my male soul, even though I was in my 70’s and had mentored many men.  Father Hunger in a man’s soul is nourished by the embrace of the loving, unconditional acceptance of a father figure.  Ernie was that for me.  I asked for a hug every Wed.  I went to see Ernie to just share what was on my heart.  I was looking for both correction and affirmation from a godly, gentle, patriarch of the Church.  In Ernie’s presence I absorbed a godly “masculine energy” that made me more spiritually alive as a man.  I encourage every man reading this blog, to be on the look out for a man like Ernie. When you find that man, hang out with him and absorb “the masculine energy.”

Ernie was himself.  He was humble, plain spoken man, who had learned through the hard knocks of life.  His whole life as a godly narrative was on display each week.  His foundations in Jesus and the Scripture were firm.  He had thought through the issues of life in prayer and study.  It was a joy for me to observe how he handed  the questions, doubts, angers, and concerns of the men  he led.  He was respectful, caring, and open.  He always brought it back to Jesus and the Word. What an amazing layman. Even the pastors showed deference to Ernie’s leadership.

Ernie was devoted to his wife Harriet for 69 years.  She had proceeded him in death.  Men listened to Ernie and the women of the church honored and deeply respected Ernie, because of how he treated his bride.  It was was a wonder to behold.  Men, I telling you, what Ernie taught on Wednesday, was played out each week when those two came to church.  Early on in my ministry as Lutheran Pastor, I realized that my most important ministry  to the women was the way I respected and honored my wife in public.  Men, the women in your church are watching how you treat your life.  Ernie in his 90’s was an example for me.

One more impression.  Ernie honored and respect the pastors that had been at Bethany.  He might not always agree, but he was supportive, always encouraging to those in leadership. As the church struggled over its direction, with strong opinions on both sides, Ernie was a steady, balanced voice that allowed men to come to their own conclusions without being judged.  It was a rare gift on display on many Wednesday mornings.  I am very thankful that God brought Ernie Malmskog into my life for a short one and a half years.

“I love it here.  We plan on living here the rest of our lives.”  These were the sentiments of  Green Bay Packer coach Mike McCarthy, regarding Green Bay.  I am a UPer, having grown up in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, three hours north of Green Bay.  My roots go deep into the northwoods lifestyle.   I am a Viking fan, but also a “closet” Packer fan, especially when they are winning and the Vikings are losing.  I cried as I read the article about coach McCarthy, I suppose partly because of my roots.  I share this with you, because there are times when I am deeply touched by the narrative of a man’s life.  The coach might not be a follower of Jesus, but the depiction of his character and lifestyle spoke to my heart.  Why?

The evidence of the coach’s humility.  “The NFL is not a place for the humble, but here Mike McCarthy sits, in a back room at Lambeau Field, perfectly content with being the least-talked-about coach in this weekend’s conference championship games.”  (The Packers lost a heart breaker to Seattle).   Humility in a man shows he is content in his “own skin,” not needing to impress.  The focus is on others.   In the coach’s case, it is his players. “….making his players better is what makes him special.” Jesus put a premium on humility when he said, “For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will exalted” (Luke 14:11).  A humble man of God points others towards Jesus and the life he offers.

The sense of simplicity and ordinariness about the coach.  Those are rare qualities for a NFL coach. In hiring McCarthy, the packers, “liked that his ego was small, his football knowledge was vast and he came from a place that in many ways was similar to Green Bay.”  The article goes on to say that, “he loves the simplicity of Green Bay, that the two things the town holds dearest are also what he cares about most: family and football…..He’s the kind of guy you’d see getting a beer at the VFW, brilliantly ordinary. Perfect for Green Bay.”   Men, God does his lasting work in the ordinariness of our daily lives, not when the spotlight is on us.  This is especially true with your presence in your family.  We can make following Jesus too complicated and heroic.  It begins in the ordinariness of life, like putting our kids to bed at night. Paul said of himself, “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances” (Phil 4:11).

The coach is “solid” guy  with a sense of place.  “Words that depict McCarthy, such as “solid,” tough” and “dependable” are generally used in pickup truck commercials.” He is at home in Green Bay.  The people who make up the area are much like the coach.  “When he got the job, he made a point to put incentives in players’ contracts that would reward them for staying in town for off season workouts.”  In the days to come I want to be around men who are “solid” in character, with a sense of place. There is no pretense, just committed men, who want to make a difference right where they are planted.  Men, Jesus has planted you and your family where you live for a purpose; to be witnesses of the present reality of the kingdom of God.

I just had to write a post about the controversy surrounding the possibility of the New England Patriots being guilty of using deflating footballs in their win over the Seattle Seahawks  in the AFC championship game.  The readers of this blog know that I am a Viking fan. I try hard to keep it all in perspective, seeing  it as a diversion, rather then a preoccupation.  Besides, being somewhat conversant with Pro Football, gives me entrance into the lives of men.

But it seems that Pro football has invaded the male subculture to such a degree that some men find it to be their passion in life, becoming almost adolescent in their preoccupation, while neglecting adult responsibilities.  When Judy and I travel I listen to sports talk radio.  The sense of urgency expressed regarding sports reminds me of adolescent boys, being preoccupied with minor issues, while their real lives are put on hold till a later date. Men, sports can be a wonderful diversion, but it cannot become a major focus on our time and energy.  A large sector of the American Male culture needs to grow up  spiritually and emotionally.

I would like to offer a parody on the word “deflate” as it relates to the condition of a man’s soul.  First, God will allow a man to be “deflated.”  Men, you will have the wind knocked out of  you, bringing you to your knees. I know this from personal experience.  God used “church people” to knock a lot of “false spiritual air” out of my soul.  A biblical word for deflate would be “crucify.”  We read in Galatians 2:20, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.”  It is when that “old false religious self” dies that Christ enters and brings life.  Deflation first, then comes resurrection.  Have you been deflated?

Secondly, to be deflated is to be emptied.  This is good for our spiritual life, but very hard on the ego. The ego does not want to be diminished.  Our ego works full time filling us with false images of a religious self.  As we are emptied of  self, we will become thirsty and hungry for God.  Pay attention to your longing.   The Psalmist cried out, “My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the Lord; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God” (Ps 84:2).   Thirdly, only God can satisfy the deepest needs of the male soul.  When we get emptied, God comes to fill us with his life.  Paul prayed that we might come “to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Eph 3:19). Jesus tells us, “Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty” (John 6:35).  So, men, accept being “deflated” as a part of your journey.

Here something more on the parody.   Remember the press conference when the coach had to give his take on the deflated football.  Well, in the background in bold letters were the words “flexball.”  That’s what God is after in our life; flexibility of heart and soul.   He wants us deflated and  emptied so that He can fill us with his Holy Spirit, who will continually be making us into who were meant to be.  “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws” (Ezk. 36:26-27).

In this post I am going to tip my theological hat.  I was motivated by the latest issue of “Christianity Today,” a magazine to which I have subscribed since the early 60’s.  I was encouraged by the commitment of CT to what  they call, “a Beautiful Orthodoxy.”  Since the days of my conversion in 1960, I have  been a “Jesus Man” and a “Man of the Book.”  However, I have had to do a lot of theological growing and stretching.  By the mercy and grace of God  at this stage of my journey, I can be a fairly open minded guy who has a strong theological center.  I have always felt at home in the “evangelical” camp, but lament that some want to define the camp too narrowly.  Having been a life long Lutheran, I have tasted the good wine of the charismatic movement and enjoyed the rich fruit of the classic spiritual tradition of the catholic tradition.  I can’t go back into a narrow “church box.”

I am motivated in this blog site to share “a Beautiful Orthodoxy,” an orthodoxy that desires to reflect the beauty of the Lord, confessing the Lordship of Jesus over all of creation and the truth claims of Scripture as the compass for godly living.  I firmly believe that the next generation is ready to receive an orthodoxy that is loving, winsome and welcoming; not judgmental, critical and  rancorous.  A Beautiful Orthodoxy is being both told and lived out in the most unassuming parts of the church today.  I fit into this camp.  I take my motivation from the words of Ps. 71:18, “Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, O God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your might to all who are to come.”  Men, that is why I write this blog.

Therefore, I identify with what CT had to say in its editorial comments.  “Only relatively recently has it seemed that to be winsome and loving, one must downplay truth claims.  Or that, to speak the truth in a pluralistic world, one must pick a rhetorical battle…..we aim to ensure that every ‘no!’ we imply is followed by a ‘yes!’  That as we name wrong thinking or behavior we also heartily affirm the abundant life in our true and beautiful Savior.”  Carl F. H Henry, the founding editor of CT is quoted as saying, “The evangelical task is the preaching of the gospel, in the interest of individual regeneration by the supernatural grace of God, in such a way that divine redemption can be recognized as the best solution of our problems, individual and social.”  I say amen.

So men I encourage you to embrace a beautiful orthodoxy.  How?  These are a few things I have learned over the years.  First, surrender to the love of God.  Open your soul to the beauty of God’s love for you, not grasping but welcoming.  Secondly, forsake all your self-improvement projects for making yourself spiritual, by humbly admitting your total dependence on God to change you.  Our effort only reinforces the false “religious self.”  Thirdly, let the healing word of God penetrate your soul, giving you a new vision of God, yourself and the world.  Fourthly, commit yourself to be a humble, loving follower of Jesus, one of those “tough and tender” types, who has strong convictions but also  an vulnerable hearts. Fifthly, run from the religious, Pharisaical spirit, which is so common among “church people.”

In his book, “The Abolition of Man,” C.S. Lewis was prophetic in pointing out that relativism – the idea that there are no absolute truths – would lead to the decay of morality and a lack of virtue within society.  Without a belief in universal moral laws, we fail to educate the heart and are left with intelligent men who end up behaving like animals or as Lewis puts it, “men without chests.”  He likened an ordered soul to that of  the human body: the head (reason) must rule the belly (the sensual appetites) through the chest.  Since the chest is made up of “emotions organized by trained habits into stable sentiments,” it is the bridge between the man ruled by reason and the passionate man, ruled by his appetites.

A culture with men without chests is a frightening prospect.  They are incapable of displaying such virtues as courage, honor, honesty and valor.  Lewis observes, “In a sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand the function.  We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise.  We laugh at honor and are shocked to find traitors in our midst.  We castrate and bid the geldings be fruitful.”  The lack of inner conviction and  godly passion, without a submission to the Lordship of Christ, will produce men with no chests.  They are “empty shirts.”

Men, we live in a day when the social commentary on the troubles of our culture will continue to be debated endlessly.  Everyone has their expert opinion on specific issues, always with the motive of winning more adherents to their position.  But every once in awhile someone is heard during all the debate, bringing light and clarity, born in a heart filled with passion for Christ.  They speak with conviction; firm, yet respectful, honoring other opinions, but allowing the light of gospel to shine forth.  Such a person is Franklin Graham, the son of Billy Graham, and CEO of Samaritan’s purse.  Now you might not agree with all he has to say, but you have to admire his clear, resolute conviction about America and the need for revival.

I believe God is raising up a whole new generation of men who have chests.  They are the “tough and tender” types, who walk humbly and lovingly, yet with strong inner convictions, speaking confidently the truth of the gospel in the midst of much confusion.  They are men of virtue and honor who have won the right to speak truth by their example.  God is reassuring these men of valor, as he did the prophet Jeremiah, “Today I have made you a fortified city, an iron pillar and a bronze wall to stand against the whole land” (Jer. 1:18)

How do men ignite the passion to be live a virtuous life; to have a chest. We can’t produce the passion.  It  is given by Spirit of God invading our souls.  John, the baptist said Jesus would, “baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire”  (Matt.3:11).  My testimony after years of  inconsistency in living with passion is this simple truth.  I had to surrender first  to the love of God.  Receiving God’ s love in all my vulnerability and shame, brought motivation to serve God .  In surrender a man empties himself, so that God might invade the depths of the soul.  From that deep center comes a passion and energy to live a virtuous life.  It is all gift, to be received.  Passion for God can never be self-induced.

Do you as a man have deep personal spiritual friendships with other men?  As I observe the next generation of men seeking to follow Jesus, I am heartened by the deep commitments men are making to stand together in what some are calling an “alien” culture. There are strong “band of brothers” forming all over this nation, meeting in small committed groups to encourage one another.  Cultural observers could accuse these groups with practicing  “Bromance.”  This is  a new  term in  our  gender confused  culture.

Stephen Marche  writing in “Esquire” maintains that the word “bro” shows an “underlying contempt for the male friendship it implies.”  Bros in his opinion are “men who get together to be idiots with one another, drink, watch sports and grunt, but never get involved in each other’s lives.”  So dominant is the preference for being machismo over that of having deep male friendships, that when two “bros” get a little too chose, popular culture has a new, sexually-charged  term for their relationship: “bromance.”  Wikipedia defines bromance as “a close non-romantic relationship between two men.”  So how do we define our committed relationships as Christian men?  Are our male friendship more then machismo and beyond bromance?  Does the love of Jesus in our hearts for other committed  brothers take us beyond bromance?  I certainly hope  so.

We read in Psalms 133: 1-2, “How wonderful and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony!  For harmony is as precious as the anointing oil that poured over Aaron’s head…”  These verses speak to the beauty and strength of deeply committed relationships between brothers.  Brotherly harmony, like the anointing oil, shows that we are dedicated to serving God wholeheartedly together.  Men, don’t let the culture define your commitment to other brothers in Christ.  Remember  we live in enemy territory.  We need help  to stand and be protected  in our day.  “By yourself you’re unprotected.  With a friend you can face the worst.  Can you round up a third?  A three-stranded rope isn’t easy snapped” (Eccl. 4:12 – Message).

At my age I am able to take a rather long, reflective view on my spiritual journey.  One of the regrets I have is not making and then keeping deep friendships with other men I have known over the years.  I envy the tight relationships my son, Kurt has made with some of his male friends.  I am now thankful for the men who have made the deliberate attempt to keep connected with me (Bill, for example).  So men I encourage you to seek out and cultivate deep, lasting male friendships in Christ.

Here are a few of the mistakes I made over the years.  First, I kept my hurt and pain to myself.  I was protecting my heart by putting on a emotional armor that was hard to penetrate.  Secondly, I didn’t take time to cultivate close male friendships.  Thirdly, I didn’t realize the strength that comes through such relationships.  Fourthly, and most important, I could not receive the  love other men wanted to show me.  When I finally came to the realization that there were a group of guys that loved me the way I was, it changed my life.  I mean that literally.  I was over 50 years of age at the time.  Men, don’t waiting that long.  Move beyond being “bros” to that of a “band of brothers,” willing to fight  for the hearts  of  your  brothers.  We alert and  attentive  to  the  “wounded warrior.”

Larry Crabb, made this observation regarding men, in his book, “The Silence of Adam.”  “Men are easily threatened.  And whenever a man is threatened, when he becomes uncomfortable in places within himself that he does not understand, he naturally retreats into an arena of comfort or competence, or he dominates someone or something in order to feel powerful.  Men refuse to feel the paralyzing and humbling horror of uncertainty, a horror that could drive them to trust, a horror that could release in them the power to deeply give themselves in relationship.”  Do you feel threatened by the unpredictable nature of seeing all those relatives again?  How will you react when you feel uncomfortable?  What about the uncertainty of those “relational minefields.”  Here are a few tips for negotiating the “mine fields” of relationships.

First, and foremost, make sure your heart is clear.  What do I mean?  Let me tell you from personal experience, that if you have not forgiven and let go of any bitterness, resentment or anger towards any family member,  they will have a “hook” into your soul.  Only with a “clear heart” will you be able to accept another family member for who they are, created in God’s image, a fallen person just as you are.  Keep “short accounts” with the offenses that have been committed against you, by forgiving and letting the others go. Men, don’t let another family member steal your peace.  You might have to practice  continual forgiveness during your gathering

Secondly, when you let someone go through forgiveness, who has been stuck cross-ways in your heart, you create space  in your heart for that person.  This will allow you to practice hospitality.  You will be able to welcome that person’s presence into your space, rather than wanting to avoid them or become defensive in their presence.  With a “clear heart” you will have the grace to give up  your expectations of how they should be relating to you.  Remember you will not be able to control the dynamics that will be on display in your family gathering.

Thirdly, in humility  confess and admit to the Lord, that you do not have love for all those family members.  This is very normal.  After all, you are related to family members who are very different then you, having their unique perspective on the family dynamic.  Nothing keeps me more humble.  I cry out for mercy and grace before and during our get together.  I ask for a heart and mind that will be openly accepting of others.  Each one can teach me more about how I  still have  to die to my  way of viewing  family relationships.

Fourthly, determine to be an instrument of peace.  Above all else, don’t let gossip, slander, or backbiting be a part of your conversation.  Determine before  hand to put the best construction on other relatives.  Go into your family gathering with  a “servant’s heart.”   Practice what I call “holy courtesy” by showing a genuine interest in the story of all your relatives, no matter how they might treat you.   I have to continually ask  myself, “How best  can  I  contribute to the harmony and unity of the  family?”

Here is good reminder from Col 3:13-14, “Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you.  And regardless of what else you put on, wear love.  It’s your basic, all-purpose garment.  Never be without it.” (Message).  Men, ask God for grace and mercy to be clothed with this “all-purpose garment.”

When Judy and I were raising our family, we had the practice of having family devotions after our evening meal.  I always tried to make  our conversation relevant to our children’s lives.  On one particular  evening as I was sharing, I said to my gathered family that, “Dad got spanked today.”  The kids  got real wide-eyed, wondering how this could happen to their father.  It so happened that I had gotten a speeding ticket that day for going 45 in a 30 speed zone.  I told the kids that I had been wrong and deserved the ticket, even though I had been in a hurry, not realizing how fast I had been traveling.

I tell this story in order to make an observation about the recent riots regarding the death of two black men at the hands of police officers.  I have no intent to assign blame or innocence.  I want to reference something that all the national discussion often misses.  That is the disrespect of authority.  We read in the Message, “The police aren’t there just to be admired in their uniforms.  God also has an interest in keeping order, and he uses them to do it.  That’s why you must live responsibly – not just to avoid punishment but also because it’s the right way to live.” (Rom 13:4-5).  I told my kids during devotions that the police officer is a servant of God, put there to bring  law and order.

Men, we need to model to our children, respect for authority.  I knew I had to honor authority and follow the laws, even when no one was watching but my family. We taught our children to obey authority by our example.  It was not always easy to be under the authority of a church council or to submit to the leadership of my bishop.  We told our children that their teachers were authorities that they need to obey while at school.  There were a few incidents where it was rather painful to have our children submit to the final authority of others.  Rules are meant to be obeyed ; those placed in authority were to be respected.

Men that is missing today.  I think we all know that.  There are a lot of very angry young men today, who literally hate the authority imposed by the police.  Granted, police make mistakes. But why is there so much hatred.  In my humble opinion, it again comes back the the lack of fathering.  Young men are growing up without having a loving, caring male to  establish limits in their  lives.  They are been taught by misguided elders to push the  limits of the law.  Young men gather in groups that only fuel their anger.  I believe we are seeing the  brake down  of our civil order, because  of the failure of absent fathers.  Society will not change till the fatherless issues is addressed in our culture

My plea to the fathers who read this blog is this.  Place yourself under the authority and Lordship of Jesus.  Literally tell your kids that, “Jesus is the boss in this house.  Starting with me, as your father, we will honor Jesus and live as  respectable members of our community.”  I know from painful experiences that your children are watching and will learn lessons that all the education in the world cannot provide.  Remember the words of Joshua, “But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15)

On “The Troubles,” a song off of U2’s latest album “Songs of Innocence,” the band observes that the  loss of one’s soul is far more serious than any social or political problem: “Somebody stepped inside your soul/Somebody stepped inside your soul/Little by little they robbed  and stole/’Til somebody else as in control.”  These words are a soul alert for men to be  paying attention to their souls. The Austin band “Spoon” has named their new album “They Want My Soul.”  The title track describes an urban pilgrim who sees that everyone he encounters want the same thing: “Card sharks and street preachers want  my soul/All the sellers and palm readers want my soul.”  These words are a warning to be vigilant in the care of our souls.

Over twenty years ago, Thomas Moore wrote a book that alerted our culture to our loss of soul.  “The greatest malady of the 20th century, implicated in all our troubles and affecting us individually and socially, is ‘loss of soul.’  When soul is neglected, it doesn’t just go away; it appears symptomatically in obsessions, addictions, violence, and loss of meaning.”  As astute social critics of culture, U2 calls us to pay attention to our souls.  Twice in their song we have this refrain, “I have a will for survival/So you can hurt me and hurt me some more/I can live with denial/But you’re not my trouble anymore.” The words, “But you’re not my trouble anymore” are rather haunting.  While living in denial, as a means of protection, is there the real possibility of becoming hardened?  We may become brittle and inflexible in our relationships.  If you wonder about  this is happening to you, check with your wife or someone who knows you well.

One of the passions of this blog, is for men to become soulful.  The call is to pay attention to our souls.  The Psalmist cried, “Awake, my soul!” (Ps. 57:8)  In Psalm 130:6 the Psalmist depicts his  soul being more awake then the morning watchmen; alert, attentive and aware.  “My soul waits for the Lord, more than watchmen wait fro the morning.” (v6) Men, don’t neglect the condition of your soul.  According to Dallas Willard, “What is running your life at any given  moment is  your soul.  Not external circumstances, not your thoughts, not your intentions, not even your feelings, but your soul.  The soul is  that aspect of your whole being that correlates, integrates, and enlivens everything going on in the various dimensions of the self.  The soul is the life center of human beings.”  There is a lot going on in our souls. As one observer of our soul life puts it, “Where I find nothing done by me, much may have been done  in  me.”

We need to be mindful of the words of Jesus, “What good will it  be for  a man  if  he gains  the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? (Matt 16:26).  Or as The Message puts it, “What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself?  What could you ever trade your soul for?”  Don’t neglect or be fearful of your soul.  Pay attention to your soul life, by being quiet and listening to what your life is telling you, instead of dictating how you think  life should be.  The soul brings us down into realities of life, while we have the tendency to life on the surface.

Do you know the meaning of “misandry”  The simple dictionary definition is “a hatred of men.”  We hear  often about “misogyny,” the hatred of women,” but little about misandry.  In a recent panel discussion entitled “Mad men, modern family: examining the role of men in social development.” the question was asked, “Is the  cultural conversation about men, accessible to men?”  The reply from Dr. Paul Nathanson, author of several books on attitudes  towards men said “No.”  Do you the cultural trend being largely  negative towards men?  Men are having to “check their privilege.”  The implication for men seems to be; “your opinions on matters of  sexual and social importance are less important, your experience is less valid, and any offense you may have  felt is less offensive than the offense you have dealt.”

As observers  of culture have warned, the pendulum between the excesses of misogyny and  misandry will continue to swing, one extreme to the next. It could be that in our present confused culture, the dominant media seems to be portraying the rise of  women, which then necessities the fall of men.  As one observer put it, “Believing almost everything we read and  hear, disparaging or demeaning remarks about men are culturally permissible, largely acceptable, and most often left wholly unaddressed.”

There is a new phenomenon among online  videos.  It involves women, men and the former being incessantly harassed  by the latter.  The best known was made by Shoshanna Roberts,who was filmed walking the streets of New York amid catcalls and sexual comments.  It has attracted a staggering 36 million views, and has been hailed as a much-needed exposure of the plight of a woman in 21st century society.  The presence of decent men have now become strikingly absent online.  It seems that men are guilty until proven innocent.  This only reinforces gender stereotyping.  One commentator has noted that, “The more the online anti-men trend gains traction, the more women will be deprived of decent male allies in the battle against abuse.”

Southern Baptist ethicist, Russell Moore, speaking at the Vatican Colloquium on Marriage and Family remarked, “The Sexual Revolution is not liberation at all, but simply the imposition of a different sort of patriarchy.  The Sexual Revolution empowers men to pursue a Darwinian fantasy of the predatory alpha-male, rooted in the values  of power, prestige  and  personal pleasure….We see the wreckage of sexuality as self-expression all around us, and we will see more yet.”  The best evidence for this is the “objectifying” of women in the porn industry, which is booming even among evangelical men.  This only adds fuel to the  “feminist fire” regarding men. So the question is “How should a man behave?”

First, when with other women admit freely how men have wronged women for too long in our culture.  I have often publicly confessed the sins of men in the present of women’s groups where I have shared on masculine spirituality.  We are guilty of gross misogyny.  I also confess my own history of misogyny.  Men, if any of you have the vestiges of misogyny in  your heart because of the issues you have had with mother or other women in your life, it is vital that you deal with the seeds of bitterness that are in your heart.  Secondly, love you wife; cherish her as God’s greatest gift to you.  Other women will be watching how you treat your wife.  Your greatest witness to other women is your relationship to your wife.  Thirdly, celebrate the complementarity of male and female.  We need each other.