I have been reading Ecclesiastes lately.  It has been awhile since I spent time with its message.  “Ecclesiastes challenges the naïve optimism,” notes Eugene Peterson, “that sets a goal that appeals to us and then goes after it with gusto… The author’s cool skepticism, a refreshing negation to the lush and seductive suggestions swirling around us, promising everything but delivering nothing, clears the air.  And once the air is cleared, we are ready for reality – for God.”  

During my senior years, I found a good word about life with my wife that had been tucked away from my awareness in earlier years.  The CEV translation puts it straight and plain for men living in a confusing and meaningless age: “Life is short, and you love your wife. So enjoy being with her. This is what you are supposed to do as you struggle through life on the earth” (9:9).  I can almost picture my own mother giving me that advice on my wedding day.  Solomon tells us in Proverbs 18:22, “A man’s greatest treasure is his wife. She is a gift from God.”  The NLT Application Bible notes, “How sad it would be to be married and not appreciate or enjoy the companion God had given you.”

I write this blog as a testimony to God’s work in my heart, helping me to be a better husband. More than ever, I am learning during my senior years the blessing of my “better half.”  For me, Judy is the one created for our union as man and wife.  She is like good wine, getting better as she ages.  Thank you, Lord…   Here are a few things I am learning in a new way after 56 years with the same woman, things that may help you as well in your own marriage: 

First, the simple reality: “life is short.”  I have not always given my bride the attention she deserves.  I have allowed myself to be distracted, not emotionally available to cultivate a more soulful relationship with Judy.  But life is short.  Make each day count.  Don’t be lazy about giving your bride attention.  Relationships take time and effort.  After all she is “bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh” (Gen 2:23).

Secondly, I am learning to “cherish” my wife – which means, “hold dear,” “protect and care for,” and “keep in mind.” I tell her how much I love her most very day.  I continually tell her how important she is to me.  I acknowledge daily my intention to cherish her throughout the rest of our journey.  

Thirdly, I enjoy being with my wife.  This means that I give her attention and tell her how much I appreciate her companionship.  I find fulfillment in our sharing of life together.  I spend quality time sharing heart-to-heart with my bride.  I miss her when she is not by my side.

Fourthly, more and more I realize that Judy is my greatest treasure and a special gift from God.  I have always appreciated her, but I have not always verbalized to her what a gift she is to me.  I often use new words to express my delight in her – mostly verbal, because written is less my style.    

Fifthly, I want to remember the last part of Eccl. 9:9, “The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil” (NLT).  Yes, this life will be an “earthly toil.”  But I praise God that he has given me a true soul mate who listens and gives godly input into my life of “toil.” I pray you can too!  

When I listen to many politicians, I picture arrogance prancing right before me, like mischievous children who think they will not get caught. We are told God hates arrogance. “To fear the Lord is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance” (Prov. 8:13).  The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines arrogance as “an attitude of superiority manifested in an overbearing manner or in presumptuous claims or assumptions.”  It is the height of arrogance when someone seems to have total disregard for the Creator of the universe who has invited us to call him, “Father.”  The Psalmist cries out, “Why does the wicked man revile God?  Why does he say to himself, ‘He won’t call me to account’?” (Ps. 10:13).

We have become complacent in our own wisdom, thinking we know better than our heavenly Father. “You were complacent in your evil deeds; you thought, ‘No one sees me.‘ Your self-professed wisdom and knowledge lead you astray when you say, ‘I am unique! No one can compare to me!'” (Is. 47:10 NET).

In at least two instances, the prophet Isaiah calls out the arrogance of those who think God does not see.  First, Isaiah 29:15 says, “Woe to those who go to great depths to hide their plans from the Lord, who do their work in darkness and think, ‘Who sees us?  Who will know?'” The second is Isaiah 47:10, “You have trusted in your wickedness and have said, ‘No one sees me.‘  Your wisdom and knowledge mislead you when you say to yourself, ‘I am, and there is none beside me.'” 

The first passage is directed to the leaders of Judah and “probably alludes to political alliances made without seeking the Lord’s guidance…There seems to be a confidence that their deeds are hidden from others, including God.” (NET).  In danger of an invasion from the Assyrians, the leaders of God’s people were planning to seek help against Assyria from Egypt.  Instead of publicly putting their trust in God, “the leaders of Judah are reduced to the secrecy of underhanded human politics.  For them, the sovereign God might as well not exist” (ESV).

The second passage is directed at the Babylonians. “The Babylonians gave great attention to cataloging all the possible omens that might occur and what they would mean when they did; it was a great but vain intellectual effort.  When disaster came, their magical wisdom was useless to either foretell it or prevent it” (NIVZSB).  We read in Is. 47:11, “But disaster will happen to you; you will not know how to avert it.” (CSB). Babylon’s wisdom was actually foolishness; it would fall because it was wise in its own eyes rather than trustful of God.  

In all of the prancing that is being done today, we need to always remember how God has dealt with the pain of our fallen world. “”For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross” ( Col. 1:19-20).    

Men, we are Jesus followers.  We need to humbly keep our eyes on Jesus.  He will make a way for us through this modern wilderness.  John tells us, “The Father loves the Son and has placed everything in his hands” (John 3:35).  As the good shepherd, Jesus will lead us through this present wilderness.  “But he brought his people out like a flock; he led them like sheep through the desert” (Ps. 78:52). 

While others prance, stay humble – and keep your focus on Jesus and the cross.