Category: Brother Al (Page 40 of 68)

Back in 1996 Robert Bly wrote a book entitled “The Sibling Society” in which he portrayed our culture as  being obsessed by youth, suspicious of  authority, intent on wanting to destroy “vertical” culture, especially any sense of patriarchy. Their desire was to  replace it with a  “horizontal” culture expressed by pop music, movies, TV, student-style politics and in our day, the social media.  For better or worse, the watershed moment was 1968.

“The sibling society stands  in contrast to what preceded it,” observed John Waters, “the father-oriented society in which authority was unafraid to speak or to be despised by the young for so doing.”  He defines authority as “the capacity to endure unpopularity in the interests of the good.” Authority expressed in fatherhood invited resentment and rebellion.  “The father” notes Waters, “was the guarantor and custodian of civilization, and even malcontented youth looked to him for guidance, free to remonstrate in the knowledge that affection would not be withdrawn.”  But today the father figure is mostly absent or suspect, leaving a hole in the souls of young men, now being invaded by the demons of a anti-Christian culture.

The Jordon Peterson phenomena comes to mind when there is talk of a “father figure.”  Peterson is speaking to the soul of  young men, who are looking for a strong, confident masculine voice to give them direction in a culture that has given the masculine little hope of finding a sense of being. There is much to disagree with, in regards to Peterson’s personal theology and spirituality, but I thank God that he is willing to confront the cultural narrative regarding young men.  I admire him for his courage and insight.

Many of those who are his sharpest critics, were themselves a product of the 60s culture of peace, love, dope and an anti-establishment mentality.  I agree with Waters when he says, “They are…..the worst kind of people to be running anything requiring even a modicum of authority, having themselves grown up thinking that youth values ought to trump experience, wisdom and tradition.”

Where are the elders who behave like grown ups in our culture.  It needs to  start with fathers and the right view of authority.  I remember well all the years  I taught confirmations classes to junior hi youth.  We would study the 10 commandments.  “Honor your father and your mother that your days may be long in the land which the Lord your God is giving you” was the fourth commandment.  What does this mean?  “We should fear and love God so that we do not show contempt for our parents and superiors, nor provoke them to anger, but honor, serve, obey, love and esteem them.”

I told those young teens that parenting was like putting a loving fence around the children.  As teen agers they would bump up against that fence and get frustrated, anger, etc.  This is normal for young people.  I reminded them that parents in their love for children would get bruised and battered from their behavior.  Then I asked, “What would it be like if there was no fence to confront.’  They usually said that they would be on their own.  Waters is right when he says the “snowflake” problem today “is the result of an absence not so much of adulthood as of grown-ups.”

“Today’s university students seek to apply the most natural and tired method of young people since the time of Cain and Abel, by pushing their elders until someone let a roar of ‘enough.'” (Waters).   Men stand in the gap.  Ask God for grace to say “enough.”  It is your place to do so.

Here is a quote from my favorite feminist, Camila Paglia, “….male identity is very tentative and sensitive – but feminist rhetoric doesn’t allow for it.  This is why women are having so much trouble dealing with men in the feminist era.  They don’t understand men, and they demonize men.  They accord to men far more power than men actually have in sex.  Women control the sexual world in ways that most feminists simply don’t understand.”

Camila is right in her observations.  Having been happily married for 52 years to the same woman, I have grown in my understanding of the feminine.   Nothing keeps me more humble then my soulmate relationship with WOMAN.  Relating to my wife and the feminine will always be a challenge.  Remember Paul said the two being one flesh is “a profound mystery.”  I feel sorrow for the rhetoric  expressed by the new generation of feminists. They disavow any sense of mystery when it comes to the masculine in relation to the feminine.

The most fruitful place to grow in the understanding of WOMAN is in  committed, faithful marriage.  I wonder how many angry feminists, who espouse “toxic masculinity” have a loving, committed marriage to a MAN.  Since the beginning man and woman were meant to be one flesh, not to be split apart.   Jesus warned us, “Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together’ (Matt. 19:3).

I agree –  male identity is very tentative and sensitive. Men have  frail egos. Genesis 2:20 tells us, “But for Adam no suitable helper was found” (Gen 2:20).  Adam was not complete alone.  He needed someone to stand with him, being his supporter and bringing encouragement in his dominion of the garden.  I would never had made it through my years as a pastor without my wife being my greatest support.  Every man needs  a ” help mate.” It is lonely without one.

Feminist rhetoric lacks understanding of the masculine.   This is due to the fall. After the fall Genesis tells us, “At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness.  So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves” (Gen 2:7).  Male and female fig leaves prevent us from truly knowing one another.

Because of the fig leaf, men are being demonized.  God made humans in his own image.  “In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them” (Gen 1:27).  Both are equal before God.  You can’t demonize the image of God found in the masculine, without destroying the relationship.  After God created Eve out of the rib of Adam we read, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother, and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh” (Gen 2:24).  Today we are witnessing a war between the sexes.

Yes, women have power in sexual relationships. The first part of Proverbs warns against the  seductive power of a wayward women. “”So she seduced him with her pretty speech and enticed him with her flattery.  He followed her at once, like a ox going to the slaughter” ( Prov 7:21-22). Pornography can destroy a marriage, when a man fantasies with a wayward woman.

I thank God for my relationship with my “Proverbs 31  wife.”  “Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?  She is more precious than rubies” (Prov. 31:10).  Judy is God’s greatest gift to me.  “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband” (Prov 12:4).  My wife is a crown in my life, not burden..  She is my “graceful dove.”  “She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.  Let her breasts satisfy you always.  May you always be captivated by her love” (Pro 5:19).  I call Judy “my bride.”

Did you know that GQ Magazine has named the Bible one of the most overrated books in history.  The Bible is ranked No. 12 on the magazine’s list of 21 books you don’t have to read before you die.  “Some are racist and some are sexist, but most are just really, really boring,” noted the editors.  “We’ve been told all our lives that we can only call ourselves well-read once we’ve read the Great Books.  We tired.”

The magazine goes on to say the Bible,  “is certainly not the finest thing that man has ever produced.”  The Bible, they claim,  “is repetitive, self-contradictory, sententious, foolish, and even at times ill-intentioned.”  The best they can say is there are “some good parts,” all the while mocking those, “who supposedly live by it.”  Instead of the Bible, GQ recommends reading Agota Kristof’s The Notebook, “a marvelous tale of tow brothers who have to get along when things get rough.

In fact the Bible narrates for us the greatest story ever told.  God loved the world so much, that he sent his only Son to die for a fallen human race.  It is the Good News the world needs to hear.  Todd Starnes gave this rebuttal to the editors of GQ.  “And it’s also the best-selling book of all times – more than 5 billion copies sold, according to Guinness World Records, which also reports that the whole Bible has been translated into 349 languages and says at least one book of the Bible has been translated into 2, 123 languages.  Statistics Brain estimates even more Bibles has been printed – just over 6 million.”

Whether GQ realizes it or not, they are only confirming how Scriptures is viewed in our day.  “For the time is coming when men will not tolerate  wholesome teaching.  They will want someone to tickle their own fancies, and they will collect teachers who will speak what they want to hear.  They will no longer listen to the truth, but will wander off after man-made myths” (II Tim 4:3-4).  When the editors, out of sheer ignorance, say the bible is boring and they tired of reading it, they are only confirming the books listed “tickle their fancy” leading them into man-made myths, rather than knowing the truth that could set them free.

When I read of GQ’s attitude toward Scripture, I thought of the words of Isaiah 66:4, “This is the one I esteem: he who is humble and contrite in spirit and trembles at my word.”  When the people of Israel gathered at Mt. Sinai, we are told they all trembled. “On the morning of the third day there was thunder and lightening, with a thick cloud over the mountain, and a very loud trumpet blast.  Everyone in the camp trembled” (Ex. 19:16).  When the exiles returned to the promised land, they heard scripture being read to them.  We read of their response “Then all who trembled at the words of the God of Israel came and sat with me [Ezra] because of this outrage committed by the returning exiles” (Ezra 9:4 )

Men, remember that the Bile has authority because the authority of the triune God is exercised through its words. That is why we believers  tremble at God’s Word, rather then mock it authority.   N. T. Wright observes, “Scripture itself points – authoritatively, if it does indeed possess authority! – away from itself and to the fact that final true authority belongs to God,  now delegated to Jesus Christ.”  In a great line, Wright writes, “When John declares that “in the beginning was the Word.” he does not reach a climax with “and the word was written down” but “and the word became flesh.”

During this year’s Golden Globes, Oprah Winfrey gave an acceptance speech stirring the audience regarding the #MeToo movement.  “What I know for sure is that speaking your truth is the most powerful tool we all have.”  Later, she added, “For too long women have not been heard or believed if they dared to speak their truth to the power of those men.  But their time is up.”   Why is there a phrasing between “your truth” and “the truth.”  Your truth is a convenient way of “undermining the possibility of agreed-upon facts in favor of privatized, separate versions of reality.”

From the biblical perspective, there is no room for a privatized, individual, subjective notion of truth.  At Jesus’ trial, Pilate asked, “What is truth?” (John 18:38).   The Christian faith points to Jesus as the truth and that truth is found in relationship with Jesus, who declared, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life” (John 14:6).  Archbishop Charles Chaput reminds us, “Truth exists, whether we like it or not.  We don’t create truth; we find it, and we have no power to change it to our tastes.”  “The essential feature and necessity of life,” observes Malcolm Muggeridge, “is to know reality which means knowing God.”  Truth is found in a person and is supremely relational.

Jesus tells us, “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:38).  Men, I cannot stress  how vital it is to commit to putting your lifestyle and worldview under the  authority of Scripture, “For the Word that God speaks is alive and active; it cuts more keenly than a two-edged sword: it strikes through to the place where soul and spirit meet, to the innermost intimacies of a man’s being: it examines the very thoughts and motives of a man’s heart” (Heb. 4 :2 – Phillips).  We desperately need to know the truth about ourselves, even when it is painful.

The Word of God is a dynamic force that reveals the truth not only of outward reality, but also of our inner life.  Men pride themselves in being objective.  But let’s not kid ourselves.  When it comes to our inner life we live with uncertainty and confusion.  What we don’t understand, we tend to ignore, attempting to repress any impulse of the Holy Spirit that would bring awareness to the ignoble parts of our inner life.  David  declares, “O Lord, you have searched me and you know me” (Ps. 139:1).

God’s Word is like a  mirror helping us see ourselves as we really are. It helps reveal the  truth about ourselves – not simply “our truth.”   “The man who simply hears and does nothing about it is like a man catching the reflection of his natural face in a mirror.  He see himself, it is true, but he goes off without the slightest recollection of what sort of person he saw in the mirror. But the man who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and makes a habit of so doing, is not the man who hears and forgets.  He puts the law into practice and he wins true happiness” (James 1:23-25 – Phillips). In walking away we choose to live with our illusions, creating our version of the truth.

The soul can only flourish in reality.  When we prefer illusion (our truth), the soul does not receive the light and energy necessary to sustain the spiritual life.  Men, don’t live on the crumbs of your truth.  Embrace truth even when it hurts. “The Spirit can make life,” Jesus declared. “Sheer muscle and willpower don’t make anything happen.  Every word I’ve spoken to you is a Spirit-word, and so it is life-making” (John 6:63 – Message).

Franciscan University of Steubenville (Ohio), a catholic college, explained recently on its website that it had posted a series of ads to promote its MA Theology and MA Catechetics and Evangelization programs, including one image featuring the San Damiano Cross with a crucified Jesus.  The administrator of the page received a notification from Facebook explaining  the image was banned: “Your image, video thumbnail or video can’t contain shocking, sensational or excessively violent content.”

The college acknowledged that the crucifixion described a man “executed God.”  It added, “It was shocking, yes: God designed to take on flesh and was obedient unto death, even death on a cross’ (Phil. 2:8). Obviously Facebook has little regard for a central tenant of historic Christianity.  Rather Facebook would see the cross as foolishness,  choosing to reject the symbol of a crucified Jesus.  Paul warned us, “The message of the cross is foolish to those who are headed for destruction! (I Cor. 1:18)  But he adds, “We who are being saved know it is the very power of God” (I Cor. 1:18).

Paul insisted that he would  “preach Christ crucified, a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles…. for the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength (I Cor. 1:23 & 25).  Writing to the Corinthians he vowed, “I decided that while I was with you I would forget everything except Jesus Christ, the one who was crucified” ( I Cor. 2:2).  Corinth was a very cosmopolitan city with all the notoriety of a port city, widely known for prostitution and other vices.  There was even a verb in Greek, “to act like a Corinthian” that referred to sexual immorality.

In this milieu, much like life in  contemporary America, Paul proclaimed Christ crucified.  It  was the “Good News” they needed to hear.  For Paul was convinced that, “Christ is the power of God and the wisdom of God” ( I Cor. 1:23).  The evidence was found in Jesus’ death on the cross.  “This foolish plan of God is wiser than the wisest of human plans, and God’s weakness is stronger than the greatest of human strength” ( I Cor. 1:25).

Men, Facebook’s rejection of the cross is clear evidence of how much our culture has lost awareness of the “Good News.”  The bad news is observed daily on Facebook, especially in the portrayal of broken relationships.  There can be no Good News without a violent crucifixion.  Without the substitutionary death of Jesus on the Cross, there would be no hope for the human condition.  But God, by entering fully into the human condition in Jesus, took upon himself  the awful burden of sin, providing us salvation.  “And he personally bore our sins in his own body on the cross, so that we might be dead to sin and be alive to all that is good.  It was the suffering that he bore which has healed you” (I Peter 2: 24 – Phillips).

This incident with Facebook should actually be an encouragement to followers of Jesus.  Our culture is longing for some good news.  Is there a  solution to  our human predicament that seems only to be getting worse?  Like the Moravians, we are followers of the lamb who was slain.  God sacrificed his only Son, so that we might have good news to share.  “The whole outlook changes – sin used to be the master of men and in the end handed them over to death; now grace is the ruling factor, with its purpose making men right with God and its end the bringing of them to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord” ( Rom. 5:21 – Phillips).

My wife and I recently went to see the movie, “I can only imagine.”  The film is based on the true story of how the lead singer for MercyMe, Bart Millard was lead to write the song after his father’s death from cancer.  The song has become the most played Christian radio single ever.  Since its release  on March 16th the movie has already grossed $60 million worldwide, making it one of the most successful Christian movies to date.  I strongly encourage the readers of this blog to see the movie.  I wish every young dad could see this moving  story of reconciliation between father and son

I have been a fan of MercyMe for many years. They are  real and authentic. The lyrics speak to the real life of men and their struggles.  It has a certain masculine tone compared to the “fluff” of much Christian music.  The fluff reaches  mostly the mind and emotions but not the soul, due to the absence of spiritual substance.  While driving on long trips I spend time being ministered to by groups such as MercyMe.  Recently “Even If” has ministered to my soul.

I was captivated by the story line.  It tells the story of  Bart’s struggle with being able to be reconciled with his Dad before his death.  Early on the movie portrays the physical and emotional abuse Bart experienced from his father.  He leaves home a bitter and angry young man.  He find himself as the lead singer in a traveling band.  However he is challenged by his manger, Scott Brickell to become more real, performing from his heart.  Brickell asked Bart, “What are you running from.”  Bart realizes it was the abuse he experienced from his father.  He is told that he must face his pain.

Bart eventually is reconciled with his father and goes on to have a  successful career as lead singer for MercyMe.  The story took me back to my early days as a pastor, when I was in my early thirties.  I had to forgive my father for not being there during my formative years,  when he was struggling with alcohol.  I had a hole and ache in my soul that no one could fill, not even my wonderful wife.  Through forgiveness, I learned to let my father go.  I came to love him for being my dad.  I never did receive the affirmation I craved from my Dad.  But through inner healing I came to an inner awareness  that I had a Father in heaven, “who was very fond of me.”

Because of my personal experience the themes of masculine affirmation and healing in the masculine soul have been  vital in my story.  At my age, visible position in ministry and energy to do ministry has faded.  But within I still have the  spiritual drive to reach the younger generation of men, with the healing message of Jesus and his kingdom.  Leanne Payne’s teaching on the masculine soul has been instrumental  in my healing and restoration.  In her last book “Heaven Calling” she wrote, what I consider prophetic words, “There is no greater need today than for knowledgeable and noble men in authority everywhere, capable of courageously speaking the truth both in the church in the public square.”

I take my  directive from the Lord in Ps 78:5-6, “For he issued his laws to Jacob, he gave his instructions to Israel.  He commanded our ancestors to teach them to their children, so the next generation might know them – even the children not yet born – and they in turn will teach their own children. So each generation should set its hope anew on God, not forgetting his glorious miracles and obeying his commands.”

Leanne Payne in her  book “The Crisis of Masculinity,” quotes Thomas Wolfe:  “[T]he deepest search in life, it seemed to me, the thing that in one way or another was central to all living was man’s search to find a father, not merely the father of his flesh, not merely the lost father of his youth, but the image of a strength and wisdom external to his need and superior to his hunger, to which the belief and power of his own life could be united.”  Many men are without a father spiritually, even though Jesus taught us to pray, “Our Father who art in heaven.”

Donald Miller writes about growing up fatherless.  He confessed in his book “To Own a Dragon,” “I need to allow God to father me.  I needed to acknowledge him as Father and submit…..this meant admitting I wanted autonomy from God, admitting I wanted my own way and asking Him to change my heart.”  Have you allowed God to father you?

Men, you have a loving, gracious Father waiting to affirm you, wanting you to hear his words of affirmation, “I am very fond of you.”  In other words, through thick or thin, your heavenly Father is for you, waiting to guide you on a journey through life, planned from the foundations of the world.  “Long before he laid down earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love….” (Eph. 1:4 – Message)  Have you forgotten your heavenly Father on our journey?

I wonder if there are men reading this blog who feel fatherless, with a sense of being all alone, drifting without meaningful purpose in life.  Last week I wrote about the two son in Luke 15:15-32  The parable also give a wonderful description of  our heavenly Father.  Here are some characteristics.  Allow them to speak to your confused, searching and longing soul.  May it allow you to come home to the father.

First, the father understood the heart of his son.  The Father probably had known for some time that his son was unhappy under his roof.  He could not change his heart. The son had to come to his senses  the hard way.

Secondly, the father is gracious.  It was difficult to allow the son to leave with his inheritance. But the son left with no strings attached, thinking he knew better.  The father must have felt great sorrow for his son, knowing he would waste his inheritance in the far country.   But he had to let him find out for himself

Thirdly, the father waited.  The text tell us the father saw him, “while he was still a long way off.” (Luke 15:20).  The implication is that he looked every day, waiting and praying that his wayward son would turn towards home.  From a broken heart,  he grieved daily for his son

Fourthly, he had compassion for his son. “His father saw him and was filled with compassion for him” (Luke 15:21). There was no condemnation, shaming or lecturing.

Fifthly, the father was demonstrative toward his son.  “He ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him” (Luke 15:2o). The son must have been overwhelmed by his father affection.

Sixthly, the father  welcomes his young son home.  The son can’t even finish his rationale for coming home. He was received with open arms.

Seventhly, the father was affirming of his son.  “For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found” (Luke 15:24). He was still his son.

Finally, the father had a  celebration. “Let’s have a feast and celebrate” (Luke 15:24).  He dresses his young son in the finest attire,  removing any shame and humiliation.

I preached recently for my pastor, using the story of the Prodigal Son ( Luke 15:11-31) as my text.  There are three main characters: the younger son, the elder son and the father.  We usually remember the younger son going away, coming to his senses and the returning to his father.  What about the elder son and the father?  I can now see myself in both the sons.

It is easy to see the outward reality of leaving and returning home.  But there is a deeper inner reality that can be overlooked. Henri Nouwen helps us with his insight.  “Leaving home is….much more than an historical event bound to time and place. It is a denial of the spiritual reality that I belong to God with every part of my being……..Leaving home is living as though I do not yet have a home and must look far and wide to find one…..Home is the center of my being where I can hear the voice that says: ‘You are my beloved, on you my favor rests.'”

Only in these latter years have I come to see the story through more enlightened  spiritual eyes.  At the heart of the story is the unconditional love of the Father.  In my estimation, not until a man experiences the awareness of God’s gracious love, will he come  home to his center where he is one in spirit with the Lord.  “The whole purpose of Jesus’ ministry,” notes Nouwen, ” is to bring us to the house of his father.”  Could it be that the greater sin for both the younger and older son is the rejection and disregard for the unconditional love of the father.

I image the father at home, grieving because his two sons could neither comprehend nor embrace his love, thus not being at home in his embrace.  When a man opens his inner life to the unconditional love of God, which is beyond  comprehension, he comes to experience with certainty being a  beloved son of  his heavenly father. Like both the sons I have lived outside the father’s embrace.  I thank God for coming  to rest in my heavenly Father’s love.

I can still wander like the younger son into the far country, drawn by my desires, attachments and compulsions, there to be influenced by voices that cause me to doubt my identity.  I become conflicted, living with my contradictions.  But the voice of unconditional love calls me home. What brings me back is the full acceptance of being the beloved of God.  I have the freedom of choice.  The father waits for me to come home.  There is no condemnation when I am in Christ Jesus.  In my coming and going I am  amazed that God loves me in my shame and vulnerability.

It is harder to see the rebellion of the elder son.  He was lost in his father’s house. He lived a dutiful life.  He was a hard working, obedient older son. But the celebration for his younger brother brought to the surface anger than had turned into resentment.  He “stalked off in an angry sulk” (v 28 – Message).  He showed little gratitude nor did he care for the welfare of his brother, who was thought to be dead.  “Look how many years I’ve stayed here serving you, never giving you one moment of grief…… Then this son of yours who has thrown away your money on whores shows up and you go all out with a feast! (15:29-30 -Message).  He had a servant mentality, still trying to prove his worth.  God saves me from “performance orientation” and a judgmental attitude.

Have you heard of Jordan Peterson?  Until a few months ago I was clueless regarding Canadian psychologist at the University of Toronto.  But since 2016, millions have watched his collection of You Tube lectures. 80% are young men between 20-34. And when he speaks in public, the great majority of his audiences are made up of men.  Peterson himself was surprised at first. He soon realized he was speaking to deep concerns among younger men.  David Brooks observed, “…He delivers stern, fatherly lectures to young men on how to be honorable, upright and self-disciplined – how to grow up and take responsibility for their own lives… Parents, universities, and the elders of society have utterly failed to give many young men realistic and demanding practical wisdom on how to live. Peterson has filled the gap.”

I realize that Peterson is not a Christian. He has been deeply influenced by Jungian psychology. His language can be pretty salty at times.  And he sees the Bible as more myth than the Word of God.  So, taking in Peterson’s thoughts or observations is a little like eating fish.  You have to take the meat and spit out the bones. Nonetheless, I am very interested in Peterson, because of the response he has gotten from young men. 

David French has noted, “Jordan Peterson’s popularity is a sign of the longing for understanding a distinctive male purpose and male way of living that is true to biology and psychology.”  I agree with Dr. John Mark Reynolds, who puts it bluntly, “He [Peterson] is what young men need and the church is not giving: straight talk that is smart.”  All truth is God’s truth, wherever it might be found. And as followers of Christ, “We can do nothing against the truth, but only for the truth” (II Cor. 13:8).  Some want to disregard Peterson because he is not a biblical believer. As a follower of Christ, however, my burden is to help men in their spiritual journey. Could Peterson’s message help me relate more effectively to men?  Below are a few of the themes in Peterson’s messages that make me think that it can:

First, be responsible. Responsibility is not a legalistic rod to beat men down, but rather an invitation to be honorable and self-disciplined.  Peterson talks about carrying our burden. “Pick up the heaviest thing you can find and carry it.”  He finds that men hunger for such a challenge. Being responsible is a manly attribute, not a source of crushing shame.

Second, find meaning and purpose.  Peterson believes people have a hunger for principles and direction.  Don’t buy into postmodern relativism and pessimism. Young men can make a difference.  But they need to accept the burden of being responsible in order to move toward what is meaningful.

Third, carry a good dose of realism. Tim Lott says of Peterson’s worldview, “Life is tragic.” You are tiny and flawed and ignorant and weak and everything else is huge complex and overwhelming.”  Yes, life is hard.  Learn to lean into pain.

Fourth, free yourself from the grip of groupthink. “At some level Peterson is offering assertiveness training,” notes Brooks, “to men whom society is trying to turn into emasculated snowflakes.”

Fifth, remember that gender matters.  Boys and young men need guidance and reassurance of their maleness.  For this Peterson gets his most vocal feedback.  Peterson maintains, “Boys’ interests tilt toward things,” while “girls’ interests tilt toward people.” “Men and women won’t sort themselves into the same categories, if you leave them alone. These interests are strongly influenced by biological factors.”  Because of this, Peterson believes boys are suffering in the modern world.

It can be disconcerting to live in spiritual darkness with the ‘lights out.” We want to know, understand and be aware of God’s presence.  For many years I never understood the reality of “the dark night of the soul.”   We read in Psalm 139:11-12, “I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night – but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.  To you the night shines as bright as day.  Darkness and light are the same to you. (NLT)” While I might be in darkness it can be light to  the Lord.  In Psalm 112:4 we are told, “Even in the darkness light dawns for the upright.”

Michael W. Smith in his new CD has a song entitled, “Light to You.”  It has ministered to my heart.  Part of the chorus goes like this, “Even the darkness is light to You.  It’s hard to believe it but You say it’s true.  Even the darkness is light to You.” Also included are the words, “If I made my  bed in the depths/if I rise on the wings of the morning/ to the farthest horizon/You’re there/You’ll find me.”  Not very often do I hear a contemporary worship song that has such a rich contemplative expression.

By contemplative I mean coming to know and experience God beyond our thoughts, images and feelings, that is, when the lights go out.  This is a  time of letting go of the familiar ways of knowing Lord  as our understanding is darkened.  This can be a disorientating learning to trust the Lord in the darkness.  Gerald May, a spiritual guide who has helped me greatly has observed, “The dark night of the soul is not an event on passing through and gets beyond, but rather a deep ongoing process that characterizes our spiritual life.  In this sense, the dark night is a person’s hidden life in God.”

Men, years ago I read a prediction by a well know theologian, who believed that the Christian of the future would be a mystic. I believe this is coming true.  The prophet Amos prophesied, “The days are coming,” declares the Sovereign Lord, “when I will send a famine through the land – not a famine of food or a thirst for water, but a famine of hearing the words of the Lord.” (Amos 8:11).  The mystic or contemplative is one who has learned to trust God, while being lead into the darkness.  We don’t need to understand or be in control.  In deepening our relationship with the Lord, we are being prepared for the famine of the Word that will plunge our culture into darkness.

William Johnston notes that in the darkness, the soul exclaims, “God was present all the time and I did not recognize Him.  I thought it was darkness but it was light.  I thought it was nothing but it was all.”  Just as too much light from the sun blinds the human eye, so the excessive light of God’s presence can cause us to be in darkness.

Here is some advice from someone who has learned to walk in the darkness for 30 years.

First, if you desire to have a deeper relationship with the Lord, you will be lead into the darkness.

Secondly, don’t fight the darkness, by trying  to comprehend what is taking place in your soul

Thirdly, learn to keep your inner gaze upon the Lord.  Use a simply word or phrase repeatedly to keep your attention on the Lord

Fourthly, learn to trust the darkness, God is doing work beyond our comprehension

Fifthly,  come alongside fellow pilgrims, encouraging them on their journey as they experience “lights out.”