Category: Brother Al (Page 67 of 68)

I am not a Luddite.  I have bought into some of the new communication devices.  But I am not as nearly hi-tech as the younger generation.  I don’t have a smart phone, I don’t text, I don’t even have an I-pad ( I do have an I-pod), and I don’t do real well with windows 8.  But I do wonder if we are losing  the ministry of presence.  Being created in the image of God, means we are wired for presence, that is, face to face, heart and soul communication.  David Benner observes, “Humans deeply desire presence…..we are vulnerable to absence.”  So the question is – do our relationships enhance presence or further absence?

Dr Sherry Turkle is author of  “Alone Together.”  As a professor of social studies and science and technology at MIT, she has studied the dynamic between technology and culture since the first computers hit the market.  She is respected as a forecaster of advances in communication, as well as how our relationships with machines alter our relationships with one another. “People want to be with each other and present with each other”, explains Dr Turkle, “but they also want to use technology to be elsewhere….We’re having fewer conversations, and more connection.  But connection and conversation are not the same thing.”  She predicts that we are becoming people who will choose artificial, digital or electronic relationships over real ones, because our relational skill will be so poor, that all we’ll want out of relationships will be empathy”.

Is it possible that we can use these new means of communication to hide who we really are?  In the practice of  texting, for example, are we becoming more superficial as we try to edit and control the image we present.  Turkle worries that we are setting ourselves up for loneliness and relational shallowness.  Are we losing our ability to have real face to face conversations?  Do we desire superficiality, so that we can have control over the impressions others form of us, while protecting  the edited image we construct of ourselves online.  I do a lot of spiritual direction, but I find it very difficult to do it over the phone.  There is just something about presence, that helps in my communication as well as being able to discern what is going on in the soul of another person.

I could be wrong, but I wonder if men are more vulnerable in the use of modern communications as a means of avoiding face to face interaction, while projecting the image of  “having it all together.”  We all have our “sphere of influence.”  I don’t know about you, but there have been times that I would rather flee from some relationships.  It has brought me to the place of humility and even brokenness, realizing how  badly I have navigated some very rough relationships.  The Letters of Paul are filled with exhortations to “hang in there” with others.  Those early churches were filled with wounded, hurting people , just like you and I.  He said, for example, ” Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense.  Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you.  And regardless of what else you put on, wear love.” (Col 3:13-14 – The Message).

Men, make good use of those devices of instant communication, but be on guard regarding to tendency to go and hide.  I especially want to issue a warning for any man reading this blog, who might be tempted to avoid  heart to heart conversation with his wife and  children.  You can become a slave to your gadgets, allowing them to rob you of precious time with your loved ones.  Be honest with yourself.  Are you avoiding or running from relationships.  In your home you set the tone.  I know when I was raising three children, while being a very busy urban pastor, I had to reach out for grace and strength from Jesus, to be at home and keep my “heart open” to my family. That took “the ministry of presence.”

Here are some words from Jesus to keep you and I humble and motivated to keep crying out from mercy and grace. “Let me give you a new command: Love one another.  In the same way I loved you, you love one another.  This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples – when they see the love you have for each other.” (John 13:34-35 – The Message)

“You are not your thoughts and emotion.”  When I first began to deal with that reality, I found that I was very resistant.  After all, my thoughts and emotions seem to be what is most personal about me.  Besides, I needed to be in control and  have some understanding of what is going on inside of me. But I didn’t want to move beyond my thoughts and emotions.  For years, I avoided being exposed to  my soul life.  I feared the “fire in the belly.”  Like many men I tried to avoid or even deny the fire.  But Proverbs 4:23 warns  against ignoring our inner life. “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

There comes a time in a man’s life when he needs to take “the inward journey.” I would like to purpose that men think of themselves as being “soulful.”  Soulful men are truly alive and deeply human.  Why?  They are aware of their soul life.  In Genesis 2:7 we read, “Then the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.”  Or as some translations say, “a living soul.”  Soul is the most personal term we have to describe ourselves.  It refers to the totality of a person created in the image of God. It speaks to depth, wholeness and inwardness.  We don’t just have a soul, we are a soul.  We are embodied souls.  Our soul life, that fire in the belly, greatly influence our life.  So we need to aware of the fire and befriend its presence.

I believe the forces in our culture  promote a superficial life of personal peace and freedom, staying on the surface of life.  The dominant media and the spread of all the communications devices in our culture, keep us all in our heads, manipulating us intellectually and emotionally.   How will our  lives  be formed in this kind of spiritual wasteland.  Men are going to have to do their “inner” soul work as never before.  If not they will loss their true identity in Christ and drift in a kind of spiritual desert, searching for meaning and purpose in all the wrong places.  All our “spiritual improvement projects” will be in vain, if we don’t know ourselves as God knows us.

So my encouragement to men is to “listen” to their souls. Paul tells us that “your life is now hidden with Christ in God” (Col 3:4).   Augustine expressed a vital truth when he said “Let me know thee, O God, let me know myself, that is all.”  While Spirit takes us up and out in our relationship with God, soul takes us down and into the reality of our every day life.  The soul thrives on what is real; the truth of our everyday experience.  Again, men that means to good, bad and ugly.  To not pay attention to  our soul, that is, the truth about who we are, is to live with an illusion.  The more we live with illusion the more we live a lie, knowing less of who we really are.

The soul call us to face reality. My great burden in this post is to help each man see that the inner journey into the life of our soul is both necessary and freeing.  You are much more then your thoughts and emotions.   At one point in my journey I was both frightened and theologically unsure of getting in touch with my soul life. You might think what I am about to suggest is simplistic.  But in a nutshell this is what I have learned.  1) I know God loves me in my stink; he is already there loving me.  2) Jesus goes with me on my journey into my soul life; he takes me by the hand so I can learn from him what is actually  there  3) Nothing surprises him; it was always there  4) The inner light of his presence overcomes all my darkness; it helps when I am fearful and unsure  5) He give me the grace to hang in there; I can’t run away from who I am – this is reality   6) I need brothers to help me be truthful; I am good at lying to myself  7) Best of all, there is freedom, authenticity and joy as a result of the journey.  I become more of who I was meant to be.

I want to write one more blog regarding Lance Armstrong.  I am tempted to do more.  In this blog I would like to focus on Armstrong’s remarks regarding his oldest son, Luke, who is 13 years old.  I watched the interview.  This is the way that AP described the exchange regarding his son.  “Armstrong didn’t break over the $75 million in lost sponsorship deals, or after being forced to walk away from the Livestrong cancer charity he founded and called his ‘sixth child.”  He didn’t crack after his lifetime ban from competition.  It was another bit of collateral damage that Armstrong said he wasn’t prepared to deal with.”  He cracked when talked about having to tell his son.  Armstrong recalled, “I saw my son defending me and saying, ‘That’s not true.  What you’re saying about my dad is not true.”  “That’s when I knew I had to tell him,” Armstrong recalled.  He had to say to Luke, “Don’t defend me anymore. Don’t”

Back in 1996 as Armstrong faced his cancer surgery he shared these thoughts about his religious views. “Quite simply, I believed I had a responsibility to be a good person, and that meant fair, honest, hardworking, and honorable.  If I did that, if I was good to my family, true to my friends, if I gave back to my community or to some cause, if I wasn’t a liar, a cheat, or a thief, then I believed that should be enough.”  In light of those comments, telling his son not to “defend me anymore” must have been very difficult.  I submit to you men, that Lance Armstrong’s lifestyle and the collateral damage caused by broken relationships is a clear warning for each of us.  Not only did Armstrong have to face failure in family relationships, but also all those people who he deceived.  Was it worth “the ride?”

A huge take away for me from Lance Armstrong’s life is the need to be vigilant in all my relationships so that there is no “collateral damage.”  The most important mark in the life of a man is not what he accomplishes nor how much he possesses.  Rather it is how he relates to those who are in the sphere of his influence.  That, of course, begins with his family.  I know my life will be measured as to how well I have related to my wife, children and now my extended family.  Jesus makes that very clear in his new command to us.  “Let me give you a new commandment: Love one another.  In the same way I loved you, you love one another.  This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples – when they see the love you have for each other” (John 13:34-35 The Message).

Men, your relationships will keep you humble.  There is no way that you will be able to love the way Jesus has asked you to love.  I have always maintained the posture of being incapable of relating well to those whom I love.  It is in my incapacity that I find the capacity in God to love.  How?  By humbly acknowledging my great need, while crying out for God to be merciful to me.  Here is how I have been helped in my incapacity.  First I open my heart to receive the love of God.  Then I humbly as God to give me a servant’s heart for those with whom I relate.  I take the initiative to reach out, even when the relationship is strained.  Finally, I try to get into the other person’s shoes.  That is, I do all I can to enter into their story.  Most of all, I can not stress enough the vital practice of living a life of forgiveness.  Forgiveness frees us to live with an open heart and spirit.  You cannot relate well, when your spirit is closed.

I have been thinking of the tragic story of Lance Armstrong  and the lessons his story can teach men.  As many of you know, he granted Oprah Winfrey a two hour interview, in which he talked of his “fall from grace.”  Armstrong, who overcame cancer and won seven Tour de France titles, which make him one of the most successful athletes in the world, confessed to Winfrey that he had been using illegal performance enhancing drugs his entire career.  He admitted that he had falsely accused people of lying when they suggested that he had been doping, and that he had been taking the exact substances the U.S. Anti-doping Agency accused of him of using.  After finally losing the legal battle against the ADA last year, Armstrong was stripped of all his Tour de France titles, he was banned from the sport for life, and has lost millions in sponsorship deals.  That is quite a public fall from grace.

In his interview with Oprah he admitted that he had lost his way.  “I just think it was about the ride and losing myself, getting caught up in that, and doing all those things along the way that enabled that”   he said.  “The ultimate crime is the betrayal of those people that supported me and believed in me.”  In my opinion, as I watched the second interview, Armstrong was the most vulnerable when he had to tell his 13 year old son,  “Don’t defend me anymore. Don’t.” While others might focus on whether he was fully repentant or not, I want to focus on what he called “the ride.”

As men we all can get caught up in our own “ride to success.”  While it might not be as dramatic and slick as that of Armstrong, we as men, have that built in competitive nature that drives us to be successful in the eyes of others.  We hate failure, disappointment and especially a well-placed rebuke to our vision of success.  Let me say to you men from painful personal experience as a “professional Holy Man” who wanted desperately to be seen as “good” that your ego hates reality.  The ego is an impostor and a usurper.  While we need substantial ego strength to navigate life, the ego is not to be the CEO of our life.  It was never meant to be in charge.  It can not handle reality. The man with a big ego will get more brittle and eventually crack, under the pressure to face reality.   Lance Armstrong, when he was caught, finally began to crack.  I believe the interview, was a means for him to begin to face reality, by share a little of who he really is.  He admitted he had a long ways to go, in facing his inner demons.  His whole life was a lie.

Men, don’t let your ego help you avoid reality, causing your life to be a lie.  Your “ride”  will leads you away from reality.  Reality is the truth of who we really are before God: remember – the good, the bad and the ugly.  God loves you right there in your reality, with all its darkness and shame. Don’t pretend.  Listen to your spirit.  Allow the Spirit of God to fill you with his love and light.  Allow your soul to be open and surrendered to the Spirit of God. Allow Jesus, who loves you deeply, to take you by the hand and bring you home, like the prodigal, coming home to his father.  The son came home in all his shame and sorrow.  But is was finally home, to where he belonged.  This is ultimate reality –  being at home with God.

I confess the truth about myself is that I am: 1) A forgiven sinner 2) a sinner who is beloved and 3) one who is being transformed by the Spirit of Jesus.  This confession, both private and public,  has brought me authenticity and freedom to simply be me.  Men, I invite you to let Jesus into those frightened, insecure places in your soul.  Acknowledge to yourself and to God, that you no longer desire your ego to be the CEO of your ride. My sense is that there are men reading this blog, that need to surrender to the real CEO, who is Jesus working in our spirit and soul, helping you to become who you always were meant to be.  So give up your ride, and surrender to the one who knows you and love you unconditionally.

As I write this blog from the north woods of Minnesota, I realize that most of the men who are reading this blog with any kind of consistency, are located in busy urban areas, living a very busy life with family and career obligations.  I lived in that kind of context for many years as a pastor.  I realize that you, the reader, do not have the time to be a watchman, trying to discern how God is active in our culture.  So watchmen are needed in our day.  “Son of man, I have made you a watchman for the people of Israel; so hear the word I speak and give them warning for me. ” (Ezk. 3:17)

A watchman on the walls in the OT, was one who stood guard on the walls, looking beyond the walls for any approaching danger.  In some small degree I find my focus for writing this blog, when I visualize a watchmen on the walls, alertly looking from the walls  for the sake of the men who read this blog.  I would not chose this post, but I sense it is my call to “light one small light in the darkness.”  Therefore, my focus will mostly be two fold in this blog.  First, to observe what is happening in the culture, and secondly, to help men live a consistent, godly life in the culture; in other words, the outer journey into the culture and the inner journey into the masculine soul.

Because of the motivation, I spend time pondering the activity of God in our culture.  Recently, I came across an article by Tom Gilson that stuck with me.  He talked about the American church situation not so much as being in a post-Christian era, but rather moving toward a “post-comfortable Christianity.”  Gilson maintains that the church is drowsy.  Christians have, “been fairly well able to coast on our heritage of cultural approval.”  But this is rapidly changing.  “The church in America, ” says Gilson, “shows every sign of wanting to remain in its cozy condition – even as we are entering into the battle of our lives.  Contrast that with an army sleeping in its tents and how quickly it rouses when the sentries (watchmen) shout, ‘We’re under attack!’  We hate to be bothered.”

I think Gilson has a valid point.  I would maintain that the events in our culture, during the last couple of years, should come as a “wake up” call to the church.  The days ahead will call for a new kind of leadership.  This begins with men like those who read this blog.  I believe very strongly that it will be the next generation of young men who will lead to way, as the church faces new cultural pressures not experienced in the past.  We will not be able to do church in the same way.  Men in my estimation will be learning new ways in which to both live within and speak to a more hostile culture.

Listen again to Gilson.  “Our persecuted  brethren have had experience practicing these teachings.  We may have the same opportunity coming our way.  We could blow it.  We could hold tightly to our tradition of comfortable church-as-usual.  We could try to lead as we have always led.  Or we could move wisely, discerningly, joyfully, and lovingly into the reality of post-comfortable Christianity.”  I very much agree with the four adverbs that Gilson mentioned in the last sentence.  God’s foot soldiers, those who will impact our culture, I believe will be described by these four words – wise, discerning, joyful and loving.

To practice these four virtues, you do not have to be a “super” Christian man.  You can start where you are with your family, your church, your community, and your work.  It will mean a change in perspective.  You will be doing subversive activity in a hostile culture.  But men, that is part of the calling.  We are the ones who can make a difference.  We are not going to embrace a “comfortable” Christianity.  Are you up to the challenge.  There are men just like you, who are ready to stand and be accountable.

Kenny Luck, who is head of Every Man Ministries, wrote an interesting blog entitled, “Eating Men Alive: Powerful Men, Common Fears.”  He makes reference to the recent “fall from grace” of both Tiger Woods and Gen. David Petraeus.  Wood and Petraeus in the words of Luck, “were two of the most revered and respected apex predators in the masculine pecking order.  Both breathed the rare air of cult status in the most coveted zones of male glory: battle and sport….Their falls from grace were painful sucker punches to their admirers.”  I value the question that Luck asks us to consider, “Why don’t we stop shaking our heads at men and start exploring the powerful dynamics in these stories that are common to all men?  Why not talk about the very real psychological, moral and spiritual dynamics at the root of these lapses versus just ‘tabloiding” the symptoms.”  In other words, men need to pay attention to the life of the soul.

Men says Luck are “like icebergs – you only see the tip.”  Luck observes that “below the waterlines of their visible and public personas, the invisible and personal fears that, somehow, they were ‘losing themselves’ started to envelop both men….these outwardly confident and secure men become inwardly insecure and unsure of themselves.”  In hindsight Woods said, “I felt like my life was a commercial.”  Sources close to Petraeus noticed an “identity malaise” which was a result of the transition from the battle field to the halls of Washington.

We can learn from the stories of these two men, by listening more closely to our own story.  When we get into “unfamiliar emotional territory” due to difficult circumstances and strained relationships, we too can be vulnerable to, “rogue emotions for men that frighten even the strongest and most disciplined in our ranks.”  We will all face storms in our lives that we are unexpected,  causing us to have insecurity and fear within.  When those inner storms occur it will be vital to be honest about what is going within our souls.   Listen carefully to what Luck asks us to consider. “Carefully built public images surrounding us create a high wall that private problems cannot scale.  This public-private split does not accommodate the admission of weakness…In this prison of man’s own making secrets must be kept and private relief sought.”

Men it vitally important that we are honest with our fears, when we are in troubled waters.  We all have a “homemade self” that hides behind the walls of fear and insecurity.  This is a prison in which men try to hide their secrets, while searching for some kind of inner relief, by presenting a public face that seems to have things under control.  We can become like a pressure cooker, in which the pressure to keep up the our public persona becomes too much work.  We do all we can to keep to lid on, while hiding our fears and insecurities.  The more our inner turmoil is in conflict with our outer reality, the greater chance that some of the steam built up within will let out.  It is when we do some things that out of character, as it relates to our carefully crafted outer person.  Men make decisions and  react to others in unhealthy ways.

It should be a practice for every man to know when the pressure is building up in his inner pressure cooker.  Inner stress, a lack of peace and fear are good enough indicators to indicate something is not right within.  We need to be honest about our condition.  Above all it is important be in a group or at least have a close, caring friend to hear you tell your story of fear and insecurity.  We all need a “safe place” to tell our story.  This begins with humbling ourselves before God and others.  “Humble yourself, therefore, under God’s might hand, that he may lift you up in due time.  Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (I Peter 5:6-7)  We need to remember the teaching of AA – there is no real help until we can come to the place where we admit that our lives are “unmanageable.”  Men, I cannot stress too strongly, the importance of being with other trusted men, so that you can let off some of the pressure built up within your soul due to your  fear and insecurity.

As I write this blog the day after New Year’s from our retreat house in Northern Minnesota, I sense what Paul describes in Romans 8 as the whole creation in “groaning.”  “The difficult times of pain,” says Paul, “throughout the world are simply birth pangs” ( Romans 8:22).  The moral and spiritual drift in our culture is producing “birth pangs” in many men, because of what might be coming in the days to come.  But Paul wants us to know that these deep spiritual groaning are normal.  The present sufferings are, says Paul, “not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”  Something better is coming, even though we can’t see it.  He reminds us that the pain we feel is real. “But it’s not only around us; it’s within us.  The Spirit of God is arousing us within.  We’re also feeling the birth pangs.” (Rom 8:22)  Did you get that – “birth pangs.”  Men need to get in touch with their “birth pangs.”  Birth pangs come before the birth.  God is up to something, in the midst our feeling pain.  God is bringing about something new.

The prophet Isaiah expressed something of this groaning when he said, “Through the night my soul longs for you.  Deep from within me my spirit reaches out to you.  When your decisions are on public display everyone learns how to live right.  If the wicked are shown grace, they don’t seem to get it.  In the land of right living, they persist in wrong living, blind to the splendor of God” (Isaiah 26:9-10 – The Message).  Isaiah describes a deep crying out to God in the midst of a culture that does not “seem to get it.”  He assumes that when God’s “decisions are on public display everyone learns how to live right.”  But when the wicked are shown grace, they, “persist in wrong living.”  This is why he longs for God.  Isn’t this the condition of our culture.  God’s grace has been expressed abundantly in our culture, but we continue to persist in wrong living, “blind to the splendor of God.”

But take heart, men.  There is a new day coming.  God is birthing something new.  “Everything in creation is being more or less held back.  God reins it in until both creation and all the creatures are ready and can be released at the same moment into the glorious times ahead.  Meanwhile, the joyful anticipation deepens” (Romans 8:21).   Something glorious, that we can not visualize, is about to be birthed by God.  We are to live in “joyful anticipation.”  “That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother.  We are enlarged in the waiting.  We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us.  But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy (Rom. 8:24-25).  Enduring our present conditions only makes us strong, giving us a greater expectation of what God will do

So men if you feel pregnant with groaning and pain due to the moral and spiritual condition of our culture, accept this condition as normal.  This means that you are spiritual awake.  Allow yourself to actually “grieve.”  Don’t deny what you feel, don’t minimize the inner angst that you have, nor try to rationalize your condition.  As a man, sensitive to the Spirit of God, allow yourself the opportunity to grieve concerning the moral and spiritual condition of  our culture.  But also know this – the Spirit helps us in our condition. “He (Holy Spirit) does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.  He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God.  That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good” (Rom. 8:27-28 – The Message.”

This post is being sent out on Christmas Eve. I am aware that there are young men reading this blog who have young children.  Many of you have done some soul searching with you wives, as you contemplate the events in Newtown.  My burden in this blog is to give each man a renewed sense of hope, especially as we celebrate once again the birth of King Jesus.  We read in I Peter 1:3, “In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.”  Our hope in Jesus is a “living” hope.  Think of hope as “the confident anticipation of a positive future.”  Our hope is confident and living because it is based on the victory and return of King Jesus.  It might not seem like it at times, but the King has landed.

One of my favorite images of Christmas for many years has been based on these words from C.S. Lewis.  I have referenced to it in many Christmas Eve services.  “Enemy-occupied territory – that is what this world is.  Christianity is the story of how the rightful king has landed, you might say in disguise, and is calling us all to take part in a great campaign of sabotage.”   King Jesus has invaded behind enemy lines.  He invites us into a great campaign of sabotage. As John Stonestreet observed on Breakpoint,  “by ’emptying himself’ of his royal glory, assuming ‘the form of a servant’ (Phil 2:7), and becoming least of all,  God the Son did what all the mightiest kings and emperors of the world could not accomplish with all their armies: He ended the reign of sin, thereby sounding the knell for death and Satan, himself.”

Remember hope means that we are waiting.  But in our waiting, God is accompanying us at the deepest level of our being.  Listen – “Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along.  If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.   He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God.  That’s why we can be sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good” (Rom 8:26 – 28 – The Message).

In our waiting for King Jesus return, here are three realities to ponder.   First, we are behind enemy lines.  Our culture is occupied territory.  But we know that King Jesus has already come, having fought the battle for us and won.  He has been giving authority to reign as Lord of history.  As followers of the King we need not fear.  The enemy knows he is defeated. “For the Devil’s come down on you with both feet; he’s had a great fall.  He’s wild and raging with anger; he hasn’t much time and he knows it”  (Rev 12:12 – The Message).  We know victory is assured.  Yes, King Jesus is coming back to claim what is his.

Secondly, at His birth King Jesus came in disguise.  He came as the Lamb of God and in doing so won a complete victory by his sacrificial death of the cross.  But he rose again victorious.  He went back to heaven and now sits at the right hand of the Father.  He is now the Lion of Judah.  In Revelation John has a vision in which he saw a scroll, that represented God’s plan for history.  We read, “Do not weep.  See, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, has triumphed.  He is able to open the scroll and its seven seals.” (Rev 5:5).  His purpose as King will be accomplished when He returns

Thirdly, men, we are on “a great campaign of sabotage.”  I have mentioned previously that we are to be subversive. Therefore, we need to be  courageous and confident. We work against to culture.  It is subtle work, done with loving and humble hearts.  As saboteurs we give our allegiance is to the King of Kings.  “Do not be afraid.  I am the First and the Last.  I am the Living One; I was dead, and now look, I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades.” (Rev. 1:17-18).  Men, lift up your eyes, the King is coming.

I heard this term for the first time when James Houston, from Regent College referred to its important for the spiritual journey.  He said it has been lost to the Western church, but has always been an important ingredent in understanding spiritual growth.  What double knowledge implies is that a knowledge of God and a knowledge of ourselves are intimately linked together in the life of faithfulness to God.  John Calvin, for example, wrote, “Our wisdom, is so far as it ought to be deemed true and solid wisdom, consists almost entirely of two parts: the knowledge of God and the knowledge of ourselves….The knowledge of God and the knowledge of ourselves are bound together by a mutual tie.”  Paul told young Timothy, “pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching.”  (I Tim 4:16). 

For the first 2o years of my spiritual journey, I never heard of this truth.  I had been taught that any awareness and paying attention to  heart or soul, was  dangerous introspection, which  would lead me into the murky waters of emotions, desires and longings.  I should stay in my head, learning, absorbing and reflecting on God’s objective truth, found in Scripture.  This would point me to Jesus.  I should leave it at that.  The problem was that I know there deep emotions and desires that would bubble to the surface that I could not control.  It took me a couple of years before I was willing to begin the inner journey. 

I can not impress on the men who read this blog the importance of the inner journey, in which we gain knowledge of ourselves, that is, the good, the bad and the ugly.  Most men’s material and men’s group lack the awareness of this important truth.  The one exception is the local AA group.  There you find honesty and humility.  The men in AA are willing to go to the bottom of the pain.  So men, find a brother who will be a loving mirror in your life.  Let him know the secrets of your soul.  Find a group of guys that are willing to go into the issues of the soul, rather then staying on the surface having safe “God talk.”

I would like to quote from David Benner who has helped me so much this area of my walk. “Christian spirituality involves a transformation of the self that occurs only when God and self are both deeply known….Though there has never been any serious theological quarrel with this ancient Christian understanding, it has been largely forgotten by the contemporary church.  We have focused on knowing God and tended to ignore knowing ourselves.  The consequences have been grievous – marriages betrayed, families destroyed, ministries shipwrecked and endless numbers of people damaged.”

I have no idea who or how many men read this blog.  I know I am committed to faithfully post each week.  If you have read enough of my blogs, you get a sense that I am committed to the inner journey.  This might be new to your understanding.  You might not like the idea.  You might be reluctent to take the inner journey.  My challenge to you, is to be open to the journey.  This is what God has called me to do.  My call is the help in bringing healing the broken hearts of men.  The church in its practice and teaching has given us permission to stay on the surface, while the souls of men are broken and hurting.

I have been reading a very informative book about men by Richard E Simmons III, entitled “The True Measure of a Man.”  In this book Simmons contents that “Men so often define themselves by what they do, who they know, or what they own.  And when they do so, they unwittingly set themselves up for great confusion and failure in their personal lives.”  Because of the economic downturn and the uncertainty in the work place many men are “living alone in their private worlds of self-doubt and fear.  They live with a sense of powerlessness because they have come to realize that so much of what takes place out in the world is completely out of their control.” 

The present cultural climate has caused men to question their significance.  Simmons quotes pastor Tim Keller, who has observed that, “we are the first culture in history where men define themselves solely by performing and achieving in the workplace…there has never been more psychological, social, and emotional pressure in the marketplace than there is at this very moment.”  When men find their identity and sense of worth, from someone outside themselves they are allowing others to help define their identity.  So the question becomes who is our audience.  Sociologist, Charles Cooley came up with the concept of the “looking-glass self.”  The theory stated that, “A person gets his identity in life based on how the most important person in his life sees him.” 

Simmons contends that in our society success has more to do with public image and the appearance of success than it does with the quality of our work and our character.  “Success today is often divorced from real substance.”  Rather then living lives of excellence, men desire to be successful in the eyes of others.  “We now regard success as achievement plus proper recognition of our achievement.  “Men would rather be envied for their material success than respected for their character ( Christopher Lasch).  But what happens when we fail and are seen as not being successful in the eyes of others.  It can be crushing to a man’s sense of self

Again who should be our audience.  When men determine to have God be their audience they can be set free from the chains of performance orientation and the strong need for affirmation.  They come to see that their identity is unstable if it is based on performance and looking for approval of others.  Remember men, your self image, that image that you have worked so hard to cultivate is just that – your image of self.  But a deep sense of personhood along with a sense of being is a gift of God. It is bestowed on those who trust in his mercy and grace.

Your worth as a person has to do with the value God places on your life.  You were created for fellowship with God.  Your value is not based on what you do but who you are.  ” We are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared ahead of time so that we should walk in them” (Eph 2:10).  What would happen if struggling, confused, and insecure men would make Jesus Christ the most important person in their lives?  What if Jesus were the audience that men sought to please the most? 

Could it be that there is some man reading this blog today who is caught in a dark, foreboding confusion because he is questioning his significance as a man.  The bottom has dropped out of his career, with no clear future ahead.  The good news is that this identity crisis could be the very event in your life that will drive you into the arms of a loving God, who wants to receive you home and declare that you are his beloved.  Your significance is found in being a child of God.  When you come home to a loving Father, you find new motivation to please him as your audience.