We are all selfish by nature and need the Lord to purify our hearts, changing us to become humble, caring and more like Him. Sometimes the Lord uses a purifying process called the dark night of the soul, when our world seems to be turned upside down, in order that we become purged and cleansed. St. John of the Cross describes this as a season from God when, after we have experienced consolation, pleasure and passion in the Lord, it is suddenly all taken away. We experience instead a time of dryness, boredom, disillusionment and insecurity, much like a dark night.
We might wonder: why would God do this to me? We miss the honeymoon of those days with passion and intensity in our relationship with the Lord. But it is all part of God’s plan to help us get beyond ourselves, our fears and selfishness and even getting hung up on the good feelings themselves. It’s a process of dying to self where everything gets crucified, including our warm feelings and security. We feel like we are falling and unable to hold on to something that feels solid. But in reality, when we are free-falling, we get closer to the Lord, beyond our selfishness and illusions. We come to know truth and to love beyond self-interest. In fact, we come to know real love after the honeymoon has passed.
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