Category: Wildman Journey (Page 84 of 87)

As you who read this blog, you know that I have been greatly influenced by Dr James Houston of Regent College in Vancover, B.C.  This single thought from him has had a great impact on my sense of self.  It goes something like this, “Personhood is a gift not an accomplishment.”  That is powerful, when you consider that our whole culture puts the emphasis on the indiviual, with its emphasis on the self-made man.   But we need to remember, as Dr.  Houston points out that an individual is  a matter of our own creation.  Identity is based on the accomplishment of the self.  Freedom is that of a “autonomous self.”   In the process we become a self enclosed self, living far from home.  We live as Henri Nouwen observed as, “people without an address.”  The result is a lonely, alienated self, seeking meaning and purpose in life

On the other hand, a person is one who is created in the image of God.  Each person is unique and loved of God as “His beloved.”  In being addressed by God we are called forth as persons.  We are “made righeous” by the work of God in our lives.  We are rescued from enclosed selves by God in Christ.  Freedom for the person called by God is grounded in our life “in Christ.”  Our life is one of openness before God as we respond to his call on our life.  We hear the voice of the father, calling us my name.   Responding to his call we come home “out of dark” of our self made identity, to live in the spaceness of God’s abundant grace and mercy 

What does this mean for a wildman?  It means we don’t have to go around created our own image of self.  That is a lot of work, working on self-image.  I have spent years getting beyond this dreadful habit.  We can rest as a children in our Father’s embrace  Paul tells us, “You received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children.  Now we call him, ‘Abba, Father.’  For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God’s children”  (Romans 8:15-16).  So, men relax in who you are.  It is a gift.  Discover  your potential in Christ.  The Psalmist give us help. “Instead, I have calmed and quieted myself, like a weaned child who no longer cries for its mother’s milk.  Yes, like a weaned child is my soul within me” (Psalm 131:2).

I have been away from the blog site for awhile.  As you notice my wonderful bride, Judy is sharing the space with me.  She has quite a ministry, sending out her daily e-mail devotions to over 40 persons.  In most of them she shares a personal  note.  She then post the devotion on our blog site for other to read if they choose.  I believe God has given her both the gift and motivation to write to others in this fashion.  I hope in the days to come, that she will be able to write more on her journey of faith

Today I would like to reflect on a phrase from Henri Nouwen that is well known.  It is the phrase, “downward mobility.”  Nouwen sees downward mobility as, “the great parodox which Scripture reveals to us in that real and total freedom is only found through downward mobility.  The Word of God came down to us and lived among us as a slave.  This divine way is indeed the downward way.”  Jesus said of himself, “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his  life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45)

For sometime I have thought of this phrase in relation to wildmen and our culture.  There is something about downward mobility that is truly foreign to the temperament of contemporary men.  I would say that most men would flee from the idea of downward mobility.  So many concepts  that are implied in this phrase go against against our thinking and experience as men.  Images such as letting go, be defenseless,  putting self last, being a servant, etc.  These just don’t feel right.   Could it be that when a wildman gets in touch with his heart,  the whole concept of downward mobility can take on a new and fresh meaning for his following of Jesus.  I would like to think so.

I especially think “downward mobility” is a great phrase to use in our relationship with the  women in  our lives.  This phrase fits well with what we men know all to well, but have a hard time in following through on –  “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…” (Eph5:25).  I have always understood this passage to mean that in relationship with our wives and other significant women in our lives, our ego (the male ego) is the one that must get out of the way.  We as men are to set the tone for the interaction with our wives, by humbling ourselves the way Jesus did.  Don’t expect your wife to do this first.  This passage makes it very clear, that this is something we initiate.  This certainly has a lot to do with “downward mobility.”   What would it mean for you today to take the downward step with your wife?

The  Last week-end I heard a priest of the Carmalite order give a talk on the spiritual life.  He used this phrase, “relax, it’s finished.”  It is one of those phrases that stick with you.  Upon further reflection, I began making application to my own life.  Then I began to apply it to the  life of a wildman.  The men who read this blog, are drawn to the idea of a wildman.  It speaks to the untapped spiritual energy that lies latent in their hearts.  They are men who are believing and practicing a faith that does not seem to bring change.  Many are saying, there must be more to my journey of faith.   A wildman is ready for change.  The key to this change is transformation.  For transformation to take affect, a man will have to come out of the control tower of reason and be open to the inner journey of the heart.  This does not mean a kind of navel-gazing, where a man has to dig around in his soul,  but rather a kind of openness to the work of the Spirit, where a man is willing to  risk “coming to know himself.” 

There are those who will misinterpret the concept of a wildman.  It can easily create the impression of men throwing off all restraint, acting irresponsibly without regard for others, especially women.  But nothing could be further from the truth.  Remember in the wildman journey, it is God doing the work from the inside out.  This is where the phrase “relax, it’s finished” comes has application.  If a wildman is willing to trust Christ as His Lord, then he can come to the awareness of what Christ has already done for him.  This becomes not simply truth in the mind, but reality in the heart.  He can say, “My old self has been crucified with Christ.  It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me.  So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me” (Gal 2:20-21).  The Message puts it this way,”Christ lives in me.  The life you see me living is not ‘mine’ but it lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.  I am not going to go back on that.”

So there you have it!!  The work is finished.  It is all about what Jesus has done.  Transformation is always about crucifixtion of our old nature, so that the new life in Christ may come forth.  It is all the work of Christ in our hearts.  The work is done.  What is our part.  We are to trust the process.  We live as Paul says because Christ loves us and gave his life for us.  That it!!  The whole package.  It takes a life time to rest in this reality.  This is “incarnational reality.”  Christ coming into the deepest part of our souls, bringing the reality of His cruciform love, to liberate us from the destructive and dehumanizing bondage of our old nature.  Remember this is all God’s work.  Relax, it finished.  

The difficulty for men is the sense that we have to do something, be deserving of God’s grace and mercy.  Certainly this work of transformation in our hearts involves some effort on our part.  No, the work of death and resurrection is the work of Jesus’  presence in our heart.  Our part is to trust the process, learning to be obedient to the loving prompting of the Spirit.  That is the stance of a wildman.  It brings a freedom that releases the true life in Christ.  That’s what a wildman experiences.  He can declare with Paul, “Christ has set us free to live a free life.  So take your stand!  Never again let anyone put a harness of slavery on you”  Gal 5:1 – The Message.   Men, take your stand on letting  Jesus do the inner work in your heart.  Don’t allow the dominant male culture tempt you to escape back into the control tower of reason and control.

As we men go about our everyday life, we forget that our present Western culture is a product of ideas that were planted centuries ago in Western consciousness.  As these ideas grew and flourished, they brought forth their fruit over time.   This fruit produced behavior that is present in culture t0day.  One such idea is the individualism and hyper-individualism that pervades our culture.  While my focus in this blog is more on the soul, the mind matters a great deal.  How our worldview is shaped and informed deeply effects how we men live and have our being in a post-modern ago.  Kierkegaard warned us, “We live forward, but we can only think backward.”   

James White in his book, “Serious Times” makes this point very simply.  He talks about the “second fall.”  We know about Adam and Eve and the first fall.  White suggests, “The first fall led to God’s explusion of humans from the Garden of Eden.  The second fall occurred when we returned the favor.  The leaders of science and commerce, of education and political machination have ceased operating with any reference to a transcendent truth, much less a deity.”  This is new in Western history.  We lives without a need for God.  My concern is how this effects men and their self-understanding

One of these “seed ideas” was planted by a  Christian philosopher named Boethius in the 6th century.  This simple idea has grown to greatly impact our day.  He defined a person as “an individual substance of a rational nature.”   This definition implies that we are basically “self-enclosed” persons, who are primarily rational beings.  There is nothing in this definition that points to the importance of relationships and the intutive-imaginative aspect our the heart.  We are “separate selves with individual centers of consciousness.”  In other words, we can do it alone.  We don’t need help.  We can “fix” ourselves and others

From the seeds of this thought our modern Western understanding of  persons has been evovled to that of  free, rational subjects who act on their own. From this has come the emphasis on individualism. with the priority on thinking.  The John Wayne and Rambo mentality is found in this idea.  Women have suffered for years in our culture, because men have not valued the importance of personal relationships, fearful of knowing what is hidden in their hearts.   Men have attempted in our culture to control with their reason.  But men are finding that influence is not in power and control, but in “servant relationships.”  Women in our day are saying “enough is enough.”  Men are waking up to the awareness that we live with a new personal consciousness today.  It is is focused on relationships and the personal.

A wildman would totally agree.  A wildman would say yes to the need for dependent relationships.  He can not stand alone.  He is in needs others.  A wild man is like a man “coming out of the cold,” having been locked in his enclosed self for years.  He is asking for help to know how to relate to the significant others in his lives.  He is learning to climb out of the control tower of reason, into the rewarding, yet dangerou  freedom of personal relationships, where feelings and desires are being expressed.  Yes, a wild man is a new bread of man in our day.

Like most men, Job struggled to understand the involvement of God in his life.  His experience brought him to the place of humiliation, as he humbly surrendered in dependance to God.  He made the following confession. “You asked, ‘Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?’  It is I – and I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me.  You said, ‘Listen and I will speak!  I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.’  I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes.  I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance” (Job 42:3-6  NLT).  Instead of resistance, Job was brought to the freedom of dependence.  As a wildman can you identify your resistance to God, especially when you don’t understand God’s ways in your life?  Then can you embrace dependance regarding the mystery of God’s will for you as Job did?  He ended up being content to let God be God, far beyond his comprehension.

I thought of this verse when I reflected on  words from Thomas Keating reminding us that we are more then our thoughts and feelings.  Men are not comfortable with the mystery of God, especially trying to discern his involvement in our lives.  But God’s way are far beyond our thoughts and feelings.  God tells us, “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts…and my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine” (Isaiah 55:8 NLT).  He will not bow to our desires and demands.  To come to the realization that we are more than what we think and feel can be very liberating, indeed.  For God is present in our lives far beyond our consciousness aware of Him.  Job expressed this freedom when he could say, “I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me.”  Now he saw with spiritual eyes, saying,  “now I have seen you with my own eyes.”   Paul refers to this as, “having the eyes of your heart enlightened” (Eph 1:18).  Job humbly repented of all his wrong thinking in his relationship to God.  

“Humiliation.” Keating reminds us, “is the way to humility.”  I am finally coming to see that humiliation is a good experience, even though it is hard on my male ego.  Surrender in dependance and weakness to the Lord, is the path to freedom.  “Humility,” says Keating, “is very close to trust and hope.”  For hope is found as we learn to trust God.  It is not based on what I think or do, but on the fact that God is good and merciful. 

My distorted thoughts and confused emotions are not who I really am in Christ.  My life is Christ is hidden with Christ in God (Col 3:3).  There is plenty of mystery here.   As I learn to surrender my old patterns of sin  to his will, I will gain a confidence that  God truly desires my best.  In humble dependance on the Lord, “we know that whatever happens, the love of God is always with us and that He will turn even our failures into perfect love.”

Yesterday we had another “wildman” Saturday retreat here at Canaan’s Rest.  Since our place is a “prayer house” we do not have a large space for overnights.  We can  hold up to 8 to 10.  So day retreats for a larger group work out best.  There were 11 of us yesterday.  Many have been to most of the wildman retreats.  Yesterday we had two new guys.  It was a good mix of regulars and new-comers.  The energy and commitment makes the spiritual dynamic significant.  I always come away deeply encouraged by what God can do with a group of men, wanting change.  These are men who want to go below the surface.  I keep learning new things each time we meet.

I want to share one new insight that I came to me as I experienced the dynamic of a “Wildman” retreat. Remember I have said in previous blogs, that men are going to have to get together in committed groups in the days to come, if they are going to find their masculine soul.  The culture will be a hinderence, with its confused and even negative messages.  The church, in many cases,  has proven to be unreliable in giving “soul care” to men.  The feminine voice can help only to a degree.  What is needed is the “community voice” of other males.

The word that came to me as we met, was the word “thaw.”  As men shared their stories of faith coming from their deep masculine soul, men in the group could identity with the stories. It gave men permission to risk sharing, what Thomas Keating calls the “undigested emotional material”  that is “warehoused in the body in the form of afflictive emotions such as grief, shame, humiliation, anger, discouragement, loneliness, desolation and the sense of rejection.”  Notice Father Keating calls this material “afflictive emotions.”  They are “warehoused” inside, effective our whole body.  The “tiger” in the tank of many men are the “afflictive emotions that need to be released from the inner “warehouse.”  The cry of their hearts is “how can God help me to change?”  A “band of brothers” can help with the birthing process in which the pain is acknowledged and brought forth

When the “thawing” comes to a group of men, you can almost feel a sense of relief in the air, as men realize they are not alone and unique with their deep, hidden stories of defeat, failure and shame.  Our wildmen gatherings have a strong component that is similiar to AA meetings in which we,  “admit that we are powerless over our sin and that our lives have become unmangeable.”  As a man begins to experience a “thawing” of his soul, he can begin to admit his “dark side” to a group of other men.  The awareness that it is 0.k. to do so and to experience loving acceptance in the inner struggle bring a new freedom for men.  They come to the awareness that they are not alone, but they are is the company of wildmen” who share a similiar story and are on the same journey

I thought of the words of Paul in Ephesians 4:2 as I reflected on the thawing effect. “Always be humble and gentle, be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.”  For any man reading this blog, I strongly encourage you to find a group of men, who are both “humble and gentle.”  In such a context there can be  foundations laid for “space” to be cultivate an honesty about what is going on in the soul.  For it is when men make “allowance” for each other’s faults, that such space is created. Henri Nowen calls it “hospitality.”  When this is done in love among brothers, there can be a remarkable thawing affect.   Rmember men, you will not thraw out on your own.  Your wife knows that you need thawing, but she can’t help, in many cases.

I have been preparing for a “wildman” Saturday retreat.  This group of men are very open to dealing with the masculine soul.  Saturday we will be reflecting on the healing light of  Jesus’ presence in our hearts.  The greatest healing has come to my soul and many other men I have walked with when we can visualize the light of Christ coming to those dark places of our souls.  As you read this devotional, allow yourself to embrace by the healing light of Jesus, as he invites you to come forth from your darkn places of hiding. 

When a man trusts Christ as his Savior, the Lord Jesus comes to dwell in his heart (soul).  The presence of the third person of the Trinity, the Holy Spirit enters to live within his heart.  “And we know he lives in us because the Spirit he gave us lives in us” (I John 2:24 NLT).  Paul reminds us that this presence is first and foremost the  presence of love.  “How dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love” (Rom 5:5 NLT).  Love fills our deepest being.  God comes to live and breathe in the soul of a man.  “It stands to reason, doesn’t it, that if the alive-and-present God who raised Jesus from the dead moves into your life, he’ll do the same thing in you that he did in Jesus, bringing you alive to himself? When God lives and breathes in you (and he does, as surely as he did in Jesus), you are delivered from that dead life.  With his Spirit living in you, your body will be alive as Christ’s!”  (Rom. 8:10-11  –  The Message)

The reality is that the presence of Christ in the soul of a man makes him alive to the loving presence of God.  This is a startling awareness for a wildman – “Wow, God is alive in me,”  bringing the very creative, healing light of his presence.  “For God who said, ‘Let there be light in the darkness,’ has made this light shine in our hearts so we could know the glory of God that is seen in the face of Jesus Christ”  (II Cor 4:6 NLT).  God’s glory is his presence manifested through Jesus in the deepest recesses of  man’s soul.  So, men keep your focus on Jesus.  Attention needs to be given to this inner light.  Peter reminds us, “We couldn’t be more sure of what we saw and heard – God’s glory, God’s voice.  The prophetic Word was confirmed to us.  You’ll do well to keep focusing on it.  It’s the one light you have in a dark time as you wait for daybreak and the rising of the Morning Star in your heart”  (II Peter 1:19 – The message)

I encourage you men, from my own personal experience, not to shy away from the light of  Christ shining in your souls.  He sees everything.  He simply waits for you to come into his healing presence.  Remember the light is first and foremost the loving presence of God.  There is nothing to fear.  “Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear.  If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love”  (I John 45:18 NLT).  In running away we run from loving reality, to live in denial and illusion.  “This is the crisis we’re in: God-light streamed into the world, but men and women everywhere ran for the darkness.  They went for the darkness because they were not really interested in pleasing God.  Everyone who makes a practice of doing evil, addicted to denial and illusion, hates God-light and won’t come near it, fearing a painful exposure”  (John 3:19-20  –  The Message)

Some years ago, when I first read Larry Crabb’s book, “The Silence of Adam” I found his description of “recipe theology” helpful, as well as convicting.  Let me explain.  In his book Crabb makes the distinction between “recipe theology” and “transcendent theology.”  Recipe theology is most comfortable in what Crabb calls “the sphere of management.”  The sphere of management, “exists wherever things are more or less predictable, where there is order that can be understood well enough so that we can use it to make our live work as we want.”  Richard Rohr calls that living in our control towers.  Men, that is what we do so naturally.  But there comes a time when God asks us to not just get out, but rather to “jump”  out of the control tower.  That is a frightening prospect for men.  But wild men know this is what must take place at some point on the journey.  

What Crabb advocates for a wild man, that is, a man getting in touch with his passion, is “transcendent theology.”  Transcendent theology “exists wherever we are dealing with things that are finally unpredictable, where whatever order exists cannot be understood well enough to give us the control we desire.”  In other words, get out of the control tower. A man finally comes to the realization that living in the tower of control does not bring fulfillment.  Fulfillment will come as we get in touch with the life of God within.  The psalmist put it will when he said, “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires” (Ps. 37:4 NLT). 

Crabb observes that, “masculinity begins to grow when a man asks questions for which he knows there are no answers.”  Men, there will always be mysteries in our lives.  Just think about your relationships with women, and especially your wife.  God asks us to enter the confusion, where relationally we have little control or understanding of what will happen.  A wild man is one who is learning to embrace the darkness brought about by the chaos of relationships.   He will have to admit, “I don’t know what to do.” 

This is the place of dependence and humility.  We come the the point of not knowing what to do or think, particularly in relationships.   As men, Crabb suggests, we have to ask the question, “Do I have what it takes to do what a real man is called by God to do?”    The answer, of course, is no.  We are not capable of navigating the confusion and sometimes chaos of personal relationships.  We need to come to Jesus in humility and brokenness, asking that our hearts might be transformed.  Remember men, the work always begins on the inside, in the deep hidden place of our soul, where all those secrets of hidden.  Turn your heart to Jesus, and embrace the light of his presence.  He will lead you in the darkness and confusion.  Above all, don’t be a afraid to enter the darkness.  I submit to you, that it is the cowardly man that will not jump out of the control tower and embrace the darkness.

I have been away from the blog site for over four weeks.  Judy and I have been on an extended trip, visiting friends and the families of our three children.  In the meantime, Judy has begun to do her daily devotions on our blog site.  I must say that I admire her faithfulness in posting her devotional every day.  I know from the testimony of many, that her devotions are read by many and then passed on to others.  I believe God has given Judy the gift of writing, especially in letter writing.  She has done that as long as I have known her.  Now it seems that that gift is being used on the internet.  I would ask you, who are friends of this site, to pray for the ministry of Judy’s blog.

For all who read my blog and Judy’s devotion, I want to give testimony to the great treasure God has given to me in my wife of over 44 years.  She is the most consistent and gracious Christian I know.  I am truly blest of God to have her as my help-mate.  Other then my relationship to the Lord, my relationship with Judy has been the most formative.  She has stood by my side through it all, encouraging me and believing in me as a man.  Much of the healing of my male soul is do to her acceptance of me as I am and the belief that God could bring change to my life. 

Well, enough about Judy and I.  I will probably write more about her and I in the day to come.  Just one thought for “wild men” today, as I get back in the groove of writing.  In my devotions one day I was struck by this verse from Ps 77:19.  “Your road led through the sea, your pathway through the mighty waters – a path no one knew was there!”  I was struck personally by the last part of the verse.  For me it meant that as I follow the Lord, he will make a way, even when I am not sure there is a path to follow.   In my own spirit I wondered if the promise of a path being there is an encouragement for me to know that in the days to come, there will be a path to follow as I keep my eyes on Jesus.  Do you are a “wildman” have wonderings about your direction.  God promises that a path will be there.

Judy and I are going to be traveling for the next four to five weeks.  We are going to see friends in Washington state, followed by visits with our children and their families, in Colorado, Texas and Kansas.  So I am not to sure how much I will be posting.  I will be back on the blog in mid Oct.  I hope that the wildman journey is stimulating some thoughts for you and creating a yearning in your soul to find new freedom in Christ, as you discov er the depths and riches of your soul life.

Again I must say, that what drives this “monk in the woods” to keep blogging is the conviction that men, both young and older, need to be in dialogue and conversation with each other about the male soul.  I have a deep sense that there are men out there who desire to be in fellowship with other men, who yearn to go beyond the programs, words and normal expectations of men in the church, to a place of deeper awareness of the soul.  Our being transformed by Christ, begins in the soul.  One of my favorite images, is that of God rearranging the furniture in the soul. 

I am only one small voice in the northwoods.  There could be other voices that need to be heard.  I might be just the person in the woods, priming the pump so that others can express their struggles, frustration and reservations concerning their soul life.  Remember we as wildmen have to do this for ourselves.  In the church we have for to long depended on the feminine voice to express what is a male spirituality.  It is time for men to rise up and do their soul work for themselves.  We need men who are strong in heart and soul, who know who they are in Christ.