In my opinion, Anthony B. Bradley, is a very keen observer and advocate for the growing crisis of fatherlessness in our nation.  One of his conclusions is “presence matters.” He writes, “boys need consistent, caring male presence not just for guidance, but for their emotional regulation, identity formation, and even biological resilience.”  Boys don’t thrive on lectures or discipline alone.  Boys will grow up when men show up, build something with them, spend time listening and calling them into maturity.  The role of men in nurturing and resilience-building is vital. The science is clear: presence matters.” 

He challenges the church.  “If the church wants to respond seriously to the crisis of fatherlessness, the boy crisis, and the breakdown of male development, it begins here: support the fathers and embed the boys in intergenerational relationships in the life of the church.  Create a culture where men see the spiritual formation of the next generation as an ordinary, expected part of Christian maturity.  And when you baptize a child, mean it.  There must be a clear rite of passage into the adult community – long before high school graduation.” 

We usually see parenting in terms of love, guidance and support.  But in recent research, “the influence of fatherhood may go even deeper – into the very wiring of a child’s stress response system.”  Cortisol, the body’s primary stress hormone, plays a central role in the regulation of mood, immunity, and long-term health.  This effect is specific to fathers.  Bradley observes, “maternal engagement, though crucial in other domains, did not predict changes in cortisol levels….The benefits of engaged fathering cut across lines of ethnicity, gender, and family structure…….fathers have a biologically measurable impact simply by showing up – in small, consistent ways.” 

Shared activity is more than just pleasant memories.  They are physiological investments.  “They tell a developing nervous system something critical,” observes Bradley. “You are not alone.”  Repeating this message by a father will shape a young man as he meets the world with steadiness, confidence, and calm under pressure. “If father presence is a public health concern,” Bradley observes,  then “the father can make a difference.”  His advice, “Engage. Invite. Share life. The body remembers.” 

Bradley is blunt in his challenge to the church.  The programming in most churches is not built for the current crisis of boys and men.  “It wasn’t built for boys having to navigate a world saturated in social media messaging.  It wasn’t built for the kind of spiritual formation your sons actually need.”   

I began learning in the early 80’s about male presence, from Leanne Payne.  She taught me that masculinity is more caught then taught.  She spoke about “father hunger” in the lives of young men.  I never know the longing in my soul was really a “father hunger.”  I was in my early 40’s, finding myself being drawn to godly men, who I respected,  wanting to simply absorb their spiritual presence.  It was more about who they were and not what they had to say.  It was my hunger for a Godly father figure.

At this stage in my life, as an old timer, I can only affirm what Bradley is vouching for among men, “Engage, Invite. Share life.  The body remembers.”   These are relational words.  Filling the needs of father hunger, will take on going relational interaction.   Bradley’s words, “the body remembers” is of significance.  Young men need to be with older saints on a regular basis, so they can absorb what God has formed in the life of an older man.  In our day we call it “spiritual formation.”  It simply happens when older men take a vital interest in young men.